Mother’s Day Debacle
I, 32F, have been with my husband 36M for 6 years. He is an only child to a living and active mother. We now have 2 children, 2 year old and a ONE WEEK OLD (capitalized to emphasize just how postpartum i am, pumping, post c-section.) For mother’s day yesterday, at the request of my husband, i chose a restaurant and made reservations for us and both our mothers. Hours before the dinner, i get a text from his mom saying she changed the reservations, meaning she chose a different place and made different reservations, and that my son is going to love it. that’s all. I felt bulldozed at this point, decided not to go, and told my husband that from now on, i want a separate mother’s day thing. this was the first time my mom was going to be with us for mother’s day since i’ve become a mom, she lives in another state and is only in town because i had my baby. so the past 2 years, it’s been my husband sitting me and his mom at a table to celebrate us both, even when i had a hard time getting along with her after i had my first child. it just always feels like i’m no more than a vessel to bring forth her grand children, and my discomfort doesn’t matter.
my question is how do husbands navigate celebrating their mothers and their wives on mother’s day? is it typical to celebrate separately or together for you? I said that the moms that are in the trenches of motherhood deserve priority. is that an appropriate way to look at it, or is this just me being hormonal?