Leaving you was really hard for me, but in the end, I managed to do it. I still can’t bring myself to delete our chats or your pictures. Sometimes I go back and read our conversations again, and whenever I see something that reminds me of you, I just hope you’re doing well wherever you are. And thank you for not calling or reaching out I would’ve answered anyway.
I’m not calling, not asking about you anymore. May your peace last forever, and may your happiness always remain.
I don’t know where you are, what you’re doing, or whose voice fills your silence now…
but I miss you in the quietest, most painful way possible.
The kind of missing that lingers in every late-night thought,
in every song, every empty moment, every breath.
And little by little, this longing is turning me into ruins from the inside.
I just miss you more than I can explain, and even if we don’t talk anymore, I wanted you to know that you still mean a lot to me.
I just miss you more than I can explain, and even if we don’t talk anymore, I wanted you to know that you still mean a lot to me.
Despite all the trauma, heartbreak, and silent pain you went through in the past, you still managed to stay standing. Maybe you were hurt deeply, maybe you cried a lot, but you never gave up. Now you are stronger than before, and none of the things you went through were ever your fault. Never forget that.
There will always be a sadness inside me for not being able to be there for you. I wish I could have made you feel less alone during your hardest times. Maybe I will never see your face again or hear your voice again… but you became one of the most special people who ever left a mark on my life.
Wherever you are, knowing that you are happy will make me happy too. I hope one day you find someone who truly understands you, never hurts your heart, and gives you the love you deserve.
Take care of yourself, my yellow flower. I hope life treats you more gently from now on.
I don’t know where you are, what you’re doing, or whose voice fills your silence now…
but I miss you in the quietest, most painful way possible.
The kind of missing that lingers in every late-night thought,
in every song, every empty moment, every breath.
And little by little, this longing is turning me into ruins from the inside.
Would your hatred still remain the same?
Would you really never miss me at all?
Would knowing that I regret it still make no difference to you?
If I told you my mind stayed with you all day and I couldn’t focus on anything, would you still not believe me?
Do you think none of this would affect you at all?
Did everything I went through inside me mean nothing to you?
If today were really my last day…
Would you still feel the same despite everything?
I’m holding myself back from messaging you. I know it would only make you more upset. I accept all my mistakes.
It seems that my presence has truly turned into something you hate. I love you, but I genuinely accept that I’m the one who hurt you. So if I leave your life now, would you finally be happy?
I’m holding myself back from messaging you. I know it would only make you more upset. I accept all my mistakes.
It seems that my presence has truly turned into something you hate. I love you, but I genuinely accept that I’m the one who hurt you. So if I leave your life now, would you finally be happy?
It seems like my presence is bothering you and that you hate me. I guess it’s time for me to fade away. I don’t understand how I still manage to hurt you even though I love you so much. I can’t focus on anything because I keep thinking about you. I told you about the smallest details of your face and how unique your voice is to me. I can’t forget how happy she looked in that moment. I don’t think I could make the same observations or put in the same effort to understand someone else like I did for her. As a quiet person, I analyzed so many details about her down to the smallest point. I don’t think I could ever do that for someone else again.
I gave her so many explanations, but none of them seem meaningful to her anymore. I’m sorry for disturbing her peace, for continuing to bother her even after she told me not to. I’m sorry for not being able to meet her expectations, for not being the person she wanted me to be. I apologize for everything that happened.
Forgive me for seeing that my existence has turned into hatred for you.
Forgive me for not being able to hold myself back and writing to you even though you told me not to, and for reaching out by email even after you blocked me everywhere.
Forgive me for hurting you, for breaking you, for not understanding your feelings.
Forgive me for loving you so much, for making you the center of my life, and still drowning you in hopelessness.
Forgive me for not being able to give you what you needed, for tiring you even more instead of understanding you.
Forgive me for being the one who hurt you the most while I was trying to protect you.
Forgive me for not respecting your silence and the moments when you wanted to walk away.
Forgive me for not being the right person for you, for making you sad instead of making you happy.
Forgive me for causing your memories of me to be this heavy.
When you told me “I hate you” for the last time, I knew I would never be able to forgive myself.
Forgive me for not being able to change this, for everything I can’t take back.
Forgive me not for losing you, but for bringing you to this point.
I will never be able to forgive myself.