Hello! Sorry if this is not the goal of the community, I'm very new here.
I was just diagnosed as gifted after months of tests and talks. I'm feeling very weird. For a long time in my life I thought I was very smart, but I have such a strong inferiority complex and imposter syndrome that I never believe in myself. I was always a prodigy anywhere I went up until college, when I fucked up my entire life. I failed every class I could by now showing up, because I always had panic attacks. Ended up with an autism diagnosis at 23. Still skipped all my classes, but somehow was always the best student in the ones I was able to go. Now, this year, a new psychologist decided to investigate giftedness. Well, long story short, we just finished it today.
I feel lost. I should be feeling happy, right? I am smart! I have a high potential! Yet I don't know if I want it (some personal traumas and bullying as the cause).
I want to ask maybe is if any of you felt like that? After finding out as an adult you are gifted. Or if you have any advice, any book I could read that would help me understand all of this.
Thanks in advance!