I understand that all ex cathedra declarations are binding in terms of belief and practice, as are other teachings considered infallible. But what about the more “weak” or lower-level magisterial statements? For example, a papal homily or a speech given in a specific context addressing a matter of faith or morals. Are these owed total obedience, or is it legitimate to differ from such statements?
I don’t mean to the point where ejaculation occurs outside the vagina, but simply as stimulation or foreplay. I’ve read very mixed opinions. St. Alphonsus said these practices were immoral. Feser, Germain Grisez, John Ford, and Christopher West support their permissibility. I’m getting married soon and I need to have some moral certainty about these issues (I’m scrupulous). I would appreciate some guidance for my conscience.
My intuition tells me that it is not sinful. First of all, because it seems too cold — and even counterproductive physiologically and for the development of marriage — for sexual relations to begin directly with penetration. Especially since the vast majority of women are unable to reach orgasm by those means alone. In fact, it seems that, given female physiology, women often need to be additionally stimulated through other means that are much more effective.
Added to this is the fact that such acts do not seem to go against the sexual ends of man. They are not intended to oppose openness to procreation, but rather to assist in bringing the act to completion. If one cannot kiss the genitals (within marriage), then one could not kiss the neck either, since the function of the neck is not to be kissed by lips, nor the function of lips to kiss necks. Yet these are not acts contrary to nature.
But I still have a doubt: is sexual pleasure meant to be experienced only through penetrative intercourse? Let me explain: the penis has a form and function that suggest it is designed to be stimulated by the vaginal opening, and vice versa. Or is its teleological function simply to produce ejaculation within the vagina? It is a very complex question.