AITJ for walking out of my own surprise party because the person who was supposed to be excluded was there?
I need to start by saying I genuinely appreciate that my friends put effort into this. I know organizing something like that takes time and I don't take that lightly. But I also think what happened is worth talking about because I've gotten very mixed reactions from people who were there. About three months ago I went through a bad falling out with someone in our friend group, I'll call her Mia. It wasn't dramatic on the surface but it involved her sharing something personal I had told her in confidence with several other people, some of whom I barely knew. I dealt with it, I told the people closest to me what happened, and I made it clear that I wasn't comfortable being in spaces with her for the time being. Everyone said they understood.
Last Saturday was my birthday. My roommate told me we were going for a low key dinner with four people. We walked into the restaurant back room and it was a full surprise party, maybe 25 people. I was genuinely shocked and for the first thirty seconds it was wonderful. Then I saw Mia standing near the back. She made eye contact with me and smiled like everything was normal. I stayed for maybe fifteen minutes. I hugged my roommate, thanked her, said I wasn't feeling well and left. I did not make a scene, I did not say anything to Mia, I didn't cry or yell. I just left and went home.
My roommate is hurt. Two other friends think I overreacted and that I should have just stayed and avoided Mia for the evening. One friend who knows the full story completely understands. I feel like I communicated my boundaries clearly months ago and I shouldn't have had to perform gratitude in a situation that was genuinely uncomfortable for me. AITJ for leaving instead of staying and making the best of it?
TL;DR: Walked out of my own surprise party after seeing someone I'd specifically said I wasn't comfortable around. Didn't make a scene, just left. Friends are split on whether I overreacted