Has the co parent crossed boundaries for our child?
I’m looking for some outside perspective because I feel really overwhelmed.
I share a young child with my ex (under 5). Yesterday, I found out my ex is in a relationship with someone who recently had a professional role in my child’s care. There were some concerns I raised in the past about this person’s boundaries with my young child in that setting, which were taken seriously at the time (they were fired and required to be reported to a governing body etc).
Because of that, I’ve felt really uncomfortable with my child having any exposure to this person. As my ex has hid this relationship from me and his history of lying and keeping information from me (he had an affair etc), I’m not comfortable that he would keep boundaries for our child. I’ve spoken to a lawyer and, instead of stopping contact completely, I offered that my ex can still spend time with our child but with another trusted adult present for now while things are sorted out properly, to ensure no contact from the new girlfriend and our child. My boundaries are the new girlfriend is to have no contact in any form whatsoever until we got things legally sorted.
My ex thinks I’m being unreasonable and says there’s no issue and no reason for me to do this. I feel like I’m just trying to be cautious and protect my child until we can formalise things properly.
I guess I’m just wondering, would other people feel the same in this situation, or am I overreacting?