u/AnywhereAfraid5269

We adopted a greyhound/whippet/something else cross 4 weeks ago. Until a few days ago, we’ve not left him alone properly as he whined and howled the moment we left.

Since we need to go back to work soon, we decided to bit the bullet and do it. We started desensitising to the front door and got to a point where he will ignore the front door if he’s already sleepy in his bed. I’ve now started to leave for 5 minutes at a time, as he still initially whines and paces but then lays down next to the front door after a while. He still whines on and off, readjusts his lying down position and something make a whistling noise. I’d say 50-75% of the time he is silent. I always wait for peace before coming back. There’s music on and he has chews readily available and has access to half of the house.

We’re starting an online separation anxiety course in a few weeks but in the meantime should we just continue with this training and hope it improves? For context, he whines a lot when we’re in the house too. Sometimes we do the alone training when he’s chewing on his chew but he always stops to follow us if we leave the room/house. If we dial it back to seconds, he will be whining at that point. He’s fine with us opening and closing the door but whines the moment we disappear behind it. Now that I’ve started to leave him alone for a few minutes, he’s no longer desensitised to the front door and will panic when we leave the room.

He’s reactive outside so he’s not going to daycare and only runs in the garden for now. What do you think?

My partner and I grew up with dogs and always wanted one of our own. We were finally in a position to do so and ended up choosing a rescue greyhound (he never raced but was kept as a pet). Many issues were not disclosed, including some small injuries, extreme anxiety and reactivity to other dogs and has much higher energy than we were told.

At the same time, a close friend of ours also adopted a rescue greyhound from a different place. I know all dogs and journeys are different, but we have not been able to leave the house due to his severe separation anxiety and now need to return to work and have to spend an extortionate amount of money on a dog sitter, we cannot bring him with us anywhere we go because our city is full of dogs so have just been rotting at home, and he does not get on well with my parents who were our only hope to take care of him when we need to travel. Now with his issues, they refuse to take care of him at all (they like to be out and cannot be trapped at home with an overly anxious dog). He is very vocal and has not really settled despite it being now weeks. He will whine, bark and howl the moment we are out of sight. In contrast, our friend lucked out and got a perfect, chill and friendly dog that is content alone but also loves cuddles and is very social with other people and dogs. They have progressed so much and have completely gone back to their original lives. I’ve been crying every single day since we got ours.

I’ve been doing very badly mentally which is reflecting on my work and health. My partner assures me it will get better but it’s been many weeks and it hasn’t. I’m seeing my entire future slip away. I have so many regrets and dread going home. My partner is going on a trip with friends for a week next week so I am trapped at home the entire time and I secretly want to drop him off at the shelter again. I won’t because that’s not a decent thing to do, and I pride myself in how much I love and respect animals. I lost my own childhood dog last year and it’s been very tough, and I can’t bond with the new dog because he is completely obsessed with my partner and I am sidelined every time he is home.

This has just been very very very hard. I don’t know what else I can say.