AITA for refusing to talk about buying a house until my partner works on her condition?
My girlfriend and I have been together for 5 years. We’re talking about potentially buying a house next year and we’ve started saving for it.
My girlfriend suffers from depression and has had periods of being really low and off work sick due to it. She’s on medication and has spoke to a therapist.
Things have been looking up for a while now and we’ve started talking again about buying a house next year. For the last few weeks my gf has started feeling low again and has spent a few days just in bed talking about how bad things are.
Then the next day when she’s feeing better she’ll start talking about houses again. Last weekend I stopped her when she was talking about houses again and told her we need to pause that conversation.
I said she needs to work on her depression and managing it so that she’s not spending days in bed and talking about wanting to quit her job before we can seriously consider buying a house.
I said I can’t risk buying a house with her knowing she’s still having sick periods from work due to depression and still having periods where she’s talking about not wanting to be here etc. I said I can’t have the risk that she’s just going to quit or get sacked when she’s feeling low and have all of the costs fall onto me.
She said I was being harsh but I just said she needs to focus on working on her mental health before looking at buying a house as it’s not just something you can change your mind about after the fact. I said she needs to take it seriously and actually work on herself before buying a house.
She said I was using her mental health against her but I just said I’m not willing to consider buying a house with her while she’s still having days where she isn’t even getting out of bed.
AITA for pausing talk about buying a house?