I (27F) recently moved out of a place I shared with two roommates and now I’m getting mixed reactions from friends about whether I handled it badly.
For context, my roommates argued constantly. I’m not talking about occasional disagreements this was loud, frequent, full on yelling matches over everything. It would happen late at night, early in the morning, random times… basically whenever. It got to the point where I couldn’t sleep properly, couldn’t relax at home, and honestly just felt stressed all the time. I tried to stay out of it at first but when it started affecting my sleep and daily life, I spoke to them about it. Things would calm down for a bit, then go right back to how they were. After a while, I just felt like the environment wasn’t healthy for me anymore. So I made the decision to move out.
Here’s where I might be the asshole: we had plans together like going on a vacation and even discussions about getting new cars around the same time (kind of like a shared milestone thing we were excited about). When I moved out, I also pulled out of all those plans and stopped hanging out with them. They’re upset, saying I “abandoned” them and could’ve just stayed out of their issues instead of leaving completely and cancelling everything. From my perspective, I needed peace and space and I didn’t feel comfortable staying tied into plans with people whose behavior was stressing me out.
Now I’m wondering if I was too harsh by cutting everything off instead of just moving out and keeping things somewhat normal.