AITA for setting a boundary and refusing to babysit my friend’s kids?
Okay so back story. I (40F) have a couple of younger teens and a six year old. I am a stay at home mom. I have been looking for jobs on and off for about 7 months. Like over 20 jobs. Multiple interviews and lots of rejections. The plan was for me to go back to work when my youngest started school. But since I haven’t been able to find anything ( I have little experience) and have started a bunch of diy stuff around the house my husband has told me to just not worry about a job right now and to keep working on things around the house. I know I am blessed to be in this position where I can be home alone when the kids are at school. I know this. But at the same time I feel like I put in the work and deserve a little break. Even though it’s not a break. I’ve repainted half the house, fixed broken cabinets, mirrors, painted cabinets, redid baseboards etc.
So anyways, I have a friend we’ve gotten close to each other and she passively mentioned a few times that maybe she could have me babysit. I haven’t said much if anything to this proposition. Cause I don’t want to. Here’s the reasons why.
- Her kids range from 14-1 the last three are under six and the baby is obviously in diapers. I don’t want to change diapers. I did my time and I don’t want to go back.
- I am in the middle of these projects. Taking on babysitting would push my stuff way out cause I have to supervise them at all times.
- The kids have unrestricted access to YouTube and some of the stuff they watch scare me and I don’t want my youngest exposed to it.
- The kids are really whiny. Terrible to admit but true.
- It would interfere too much of my family time as it would be in the afternoon/evening. And it would mess up my daily routine.
So anyways it keeps being brought up indirectly in conversation. That it would be nice to have a friend to watch them instead of daycare. That it would be a good side job for me. Blah blah blah. But also mention that daycare is too expensive and that it would be nice to not have to pay that much.
I have politely declined but she keeps bring it up. It’s making me feel bad because she has become a good friend of mine. But I don’t feel like I should have to say yes to this. They have unfortunately racked up a lot of debt (on unessential things) that has led to them having to change jobs and work more. So it’s kinda a situation of you got yourself in get yourself out. But I feel like the villain ( they haven’t said anything negative to me.) But the guilt inside is there in the back of my mind cause I’m a people pleaser. So give me your take on this please.