u/AntisocialAmbivertt

The type where they aren’t sure, so they stop talking to me for a while then randomly pop up a few months later when they are lonely…not date, but I guess just to be friends…but it’s hard to be just friends with someone I want romantically. So then, I would find myself hoping he would change his mind about me. I’d notice the friendship is very one sided and I would find myself playing the emotional laborer part through their loneliness until they find who they want.

I can’t do this anymore…Im cutting him off now and I’ll just be alone facing my loneliness….alone.

I want to drink bad. I’ve been going to meetings lately and reaching out to people who seem to ghost or don’t reply. Say they’ll call me back and don’t. Maybe I haven’t hit a bottom enough to be so desperate I would call any and everybody. I feel lonely, tired, angry. I just want to get on with a relapse and maybe it will finish me off for good this time. My anxiety has been out of control for days. I can’t seem to relax. My jaw and shoulders have been tense for days. I want a drink so bad right now.