Who are we that attract pwBPD?
What are our characteristics and traits?
Why do they choose us, and how do they find us? How do we find them?
What’s the psychology behind our “I can fix her” mindset?
WHO AM I?
We were both lying in bed. She was watching a series, and I had already fallen asleep. At some point, I woke up because she was talking to herself out loud. She wanted to tell me something, but honestly, I was too tired and pretended to stay asleep.
Then she sat up in bed and spoke very loudly, saying that no one understood her.
When I still didn’t react, she said she was alone forever (she said it multiple times, like repeating it in a monotonous voice so I might hear it).
Eventually, I responded, pretending to wake up, and asked her what was wrong.
She sat motionless in bed for about 20 minutes, said nothing, showed no emotion, and was breathing very heavily.
After those 20 minutes, during which I tried to calm her down, she completely escalated and started a huge argument that had nothing to do with what she had said earlier while she thought I was asleep.
I think she was too careless, and her cover was blown… They ARE aware of their actions.
Guys I am having a hard time.
My girlfriend with bpd just told me I sexually abused her years ago and she wants to be alone.
I am emotionally attached and dont know how to let her alone, especially as we have been doing great lately as a couple (maybe too great…).
She said it just came up her mind again and that she cant forget what I did to her und cant forgive me.
I know that you might recommend to leave - but I dont want to. I love her and not all bpd are the same.
Honestly I am just seeking for advice on how to handle this situation.
I cant remember what happened because it was supposed to be years ago and she just told me about it.
I dont think she is lying about it. I just honestly cant remember and I feel so bad for what I have let her feel.
I am trying to remember any possible situation that she could refer to but we never had much sex in our relationship so I am having difficulties what I might have done wrong to make her feel abused…
I also dont know what I am asking you for. I just feel ashamed and my worst. I was so happy that we get along well for months and now everything is falling apart for something I cant remember from years ago.
Usually I could make things good by letting her know I am sorry but sexual abuse is nothing you could ever excuse so I am feeling trapped.
Cheers
UPDATE: Guys we talked for 1h and we decided to end our relationship and stay friends. I am happy. And I am free.