Stupidly jealous of those who can leave their PwBPD.
Hearing stories about people leaving their PwBPD leaves me super conflicted. On one end i'm super happy someone can escape the cycle but on the other end i'm like damn wish that could be me. When yours is a fucking family member, a mother who has raised, tormented, and conditioned you for your entire life its near damn impossible because i cant leave the rest of my little siblings behind with this person its fucking suffocating man. I don't even want to imagine her splitting on and hurting them since i'm the one taking the brunt of her behavior.
I'm still genuinely glad that people are managing to leave don't get me wrong ig i needed to get this off my chest. I don't want to discourage anyone for leaving and in fact i ask anyone who has the means to do so do it as soon as you can. I'm just so stressed and sick of this. i never want to see my mom again. she fucking ruined me