I’m looking for some perspective because I’m feeling a bit unhinged right now.
My story is a "double-header" of narcissistic abuse. It started with a lifetime with my mom, and I ended up marrying someone who mirrored those same patterns. Things came to a head in 2022 when my ex-wife and I separated.
The real gut-punch happened during the separation: my ex actually moved in with my mother. They lived together for over a year and a half, teaming up to run a smear campaign against me while I was still trying to get through the divorce. They went to great lengths to keep it a secret and conceal the fact that they were even in contact. Finding out my mother had betrayed me by secretly harboring my ex was the final straw—that’s when I went full no-contact with her and that side of the family.
Once the divorce was finally settled in 2023, I did a "hard reset." I packed up and drove 21 hours away to the middle of the country just to build a safe zone and get some peace. But I just found out my ex recently moved to a city in this same region, only a few hours away. After everything I did to get away, I feel like my "safe zone" has been invaded.
I’m struggling more over this past week.
Now that she’s physically closer, that feeling is hitting even harder. I really want to move on from this and stop letting them have this kind of pull over my headspace.