We haven't talked in a few years, for a reason. He's not in my life or my kids' lives, for a reason. He mostly gave up calling when he realized I wasn't picking up the phone or trying anymore, but the phone rang tonight. I let it go to voicemail, like the last few times he's called over the years, and it was much shorter than every other rant he left. He broke his hip, and he's going in for surgery tomorrow.
I'm asking this group for any perspectives I haven't considered. Every interaction with him over the last decade was an effort for him to get me back into his life - more of a web of delusion, guilt, random attacks, and endless ranting. I tried over 20 years to figure out some version of a relationship to not let him drift off to being a man alone, but with 2 littles and a world of responsibility on my shoulders, the mental and emotional strain became too much to handle, and I had to throw in the towel.
He's 83. He broke his hip. It's likely a death sentence, knowing him, which is one reason he may have reached out - the fear. But he also, very likely, reached out to bring me back into the depths, which I know I'm incapable of handling. So in a way, I feel responsible if he doesn't make it after this; but also lack the bandwidth to give to the man who would take it all to spite it.
From this group, any thoughts are appreciated.