For example… my boyfriend got a last minute invite by his brother to go play in a rec league sport as a sub, 7 hours away. When I say last minute, I mean he was asked on Thursday and left on Friday.
I am moving next weekend and got the keys this weekend. I also am dealing with some physical issues and I’m not supposed to lift over 20lbs. We previously had plans this weekend to prep for the move at both places (moving some things and packing). To be clear, I don’t need his help, but it would’ve made things much easier and I did the same for him when he moved last year.
Anyway he decides to go play in the game and I tell him that’s a bummer. He calls near the end of his 7hr drive and I express how it kinda sucks that we had plans until something fun came up and it’s kinda a pattern of how I’ve been feeling.
At first he says, “objectively, you’re upset I’m going to spend time with my family”. After clearing up my reasoning for being upset, he seemed to get it and was apologetic. Then, when he’s almost 7 hours away, says he feels bad and regrets going and didn’t realize the importance of this weekend to me.
Now he’s trying to be sweet texting like “wishing I was with you to help”, when like… he could’ve been! Is there a name for someone who does this? Like, does what they want, then only “cares” after it’s too late to do anything else?