Me and my girlfriend have been together for over 4 years. We were both our first everything. In those 4 years I have always been clear that I do not want children.
Recently we had a bit of a pregnancy scare shortly after she had her implant taken out. It turned out to be nothing but the conversation turned into what if we did have a child.
Again I explained that right now my stance is that I don’t want any future kids however we’re both still young and my mind might change down the line.
She then got upset and showed concern if what in the future my mind doesn’t change. Which my response was that I didn’t know.
We then had a long conversation where we both decided to stay together because we do love each other and will cross that bridge when we come to it.
After this conversation she got a lot more sexually active. Before this we didn’t need to use protection due to her implant but I turned down her advances due to not having any protection and I just wanted to be safe. I bought some protection and told her I have it but since then she has not showed any interest in doing anything sexually at all.
But since our conversation I’ve been struggling with the possibility that I’m waisting her time. When it comes to the time she really wants children and I still don’t, I feel like she would come to resent me for not giving her what she wants.
During our talk I said if she really wants kids she probably shouldn’t be with me. But she doesn’t want to let go. Now I feel guilty because I feel like I’m robbing her of her dream life of having children.
Yes my mind might change on children. But I don’t think it’s a thing to gamble a whole relationship on.
I don’t want to end things, however I feel like it’s best for her not to wait around to find out whether I want kids or not.