Just a vent post, feel free to say anything you want in the comments (though don’t suggest counselling or anything please, I’m sharing this just to get it off my chest).
Im using my time wisely, I’m asking questions, I’m engaging with the courses, and yet I STILL don’t feel any sense of security with where I’m at. My mind just cannot exist without feeling some irrational sense of impending doom regarding my assignments. I always have the idea that I’m going to screw up miserably, and that winds up in me being legit terrified to even open up my assignments out of fear. It’s just so annoying, I can never just accept the fact that I did my best on anything. Like, my grades aren’t even bad or anything, I just have zero confidence in my academic ability and it pisses me off. I just with I could submit something for once and say “yeah, you nailed this” instead of constantly questioning if I did the assignment properly.
Thanks for reading that, whoever you are. Felt good to get all that into writing.