AITA: Not letting SIL hold my child
Hey all! My (24f) soon to be sister in law (28f, we'll call her T) is throwing a tantrum over the fact that I have told her that I might not let her hold my child. Currently I'm 4 months pregnant, and being the overthinker I am, I am trying to set a game plan for everything that may happen and may go wrong that way i won't be extremely stressed out over it, including establishing some boundaries early on that way it cant be said that "they were sprung out of no where". Granted, I am a petty person when it comes to stupid things and will stand my ground on that pettiness. Long story short, T and I got to talking about pregnancy, birthing process, and what comes after (like I have done with anyone i know who has had a child, this is my first) while visiting her at the hospital (she has 2, one that's almost 2 and the other she had recently a week and a half ago). It was all find and dandy until I talked with her about people holding the child. I really dont care who hold them from when doctor says we can have vistors as long as they clean their hands, use sanitizer, and doing put their mouth on or near eyes, mouth, or hands (im the eldest out of 5 siblings and 5th eldest out of 15 cousins) both while at hospital and at home. She blew up at me stating how unsafe that it (she has never let anyone but her hold the kids, not even her husband when she first had her oldest, for 6 months and has stated the same goes for her youngest). I told her if that is how she feels then she's more than welcome to hold hold my child, which she then went hysterical and came the waterworks. At that point I left, and now im being told I have to apologize to her by her husband to see my niece and nephew, my fiancé has told them that I dont have to, and now T is guilt tripping soon to be mother in law to make me apologize. I have told them that I will not apologize for my opinion and my boundaries and if they don't like it, then they dont have to see my child or me anymore. AITA for what I said?