Am I overreacting at my wife for not dancing with me?
To give some background, I’m a guy who really enjoys dancing. For me, it’s relaxing, fun, and a way to connect emotionally. My wife, on the other hand, says she only likes dancing when she’s drunk, but she usually doesn’t drink when we go out.
I’ve tried explaining to her that dancing together means a lot to me emotionally. It’s not really about being good at dancing, it’s more about sharing that moment together. I think part of why it hurts is because I rarely ask for much in general, so this feels important to me.
A couple of recent moments really stuck with me. One time I was going through a depressive period, and while we were outside cleaning up branches in the backyard, I tried to lighten the mood by asking her to dance with me for a minute. She just hugged me instead, which I know was probably her way of showing affection, but I still felt rejected afterward.
Later, after talking to a friend, I wondered if maybe I hadn’t communicated clearly enough about how much this meant to me, so I brought it up again another time at my dad’s birthday party. I asked her to dance, and she said no again. That time I told her it would be the last time I asked because I felt embarrassed and hurt.
I’m trying to figure out if I’m overreacting here. Am I putting too much emotional weight on dancing, or is it reasonable to feel rejected when your partner repeatedly refuses something that feels meaningful to you?