AITA for being upset that my dad took his girlfriend and her kids to a theme park on mother’s day a year after my mom died
Last year, my mom died. I loved her deeply, but our relationship was also abusive, both verbally and physically. About 8 months later, my dad started dating again. I’ve tried to give him grace because everyone grieves differently.
I usually visit my mom’s grave on her birthday and Mother’s Day with flowers and cake, but the cemetery is far and I don’t have reliable transportation. Last year I couldn’t go because we were out of state with my dad’s family.
My dad’s new girlfriend has 2 kids, there’s a 20-year age gap between them, and while I don’t fully trust her intentions, my dad says he admires her as a mother. My dad is otherwise a great dad: he pays for my college, takes me on trips, and has always been loving toward me.
Earlier this year, I was supposed to meet his girlfriend the day before the one-year anniversary of my mom’s death. My dad hadn’t told her the significance of the date, and I told him he should. They broke up before it happened, but later got back together.
Before Mother’s Day this year, I wanted to visit the cemetery but didn’t have a ride. I considered asking my dad, but I suspected he already had plans with his girlfriend. I ended up arranging a ride with my aunt instead.
A few days before Mother’s Day, my dad told me he had “forgotten” it was that weekend, but then admitted he’d actually be spending it with his girlfriend because “she’s a mother.” They went to Universal Studios with her kids, and knowing my dad, he likely paid for everything.
The next day he told me he wished I’d been there and mentioned his girlfriend’s daughter wanted to buy me a Hello Kitty keychain, but he even mixed up my favorite character with my late mom’s favorite. That hurt because Hello Kitty was something my mom and I bonded over, and my room is full of things my parents bought me together.
I feel hurt that he didn’t invite me, especially knowing I spent Mother’s Day visiting my mom’s grave. I’m also worried he’s moving too fast and that if I’m not fully supportive of this new relationship, I’ll eventually get pushed aside.
AITA for being upset that my dad spent Mother’s Day with his new girlfriend and her kids while I had to figure out my own ride to visit my mom’s grave?