u/Afraid_Panic897

My insensitivity got the best of me that time in September. I have hurt you and your confidence. You left me and chose yourself. I chased after you because I genuinely feel like a fool if I let you go away. By January, you accepted me again. I was the happiest when you forgave me. I swore that I would cherish you and would be a better love for you. In sickness and in health.

You got worried for the first few weeks, and we reconciled because you thought I might get tired of giving you assurances that I love you. And I am always firm in saying that I won't. Honestly, it felt counterproductive that you are still with me, the same person who caused you so much pain. I do not deserve you. Not one bit. Every time, I can only wonder how you can love someone like me. Someone who broke your trust and put you down. "What else can I do if I love you?" you said.

Baby, I will and always love you. I honestly cannot live without you. I know that my words still haunt you to this day. I hated the person I was yesterday as much as your friends hate me. And every time, you choose to fight it alone, but still let me know that the problem is not me. At least, not anymore.

I wish I could fly to you right away. I want to hold you and wipe your tears. Sing you a lullaby and keep you safe at night. Although the fear is still there that you will be gone by the time I can be the lover deserving of you. That is why I'm writing this letter. I am still hoping that you will still let me be by your side. I never want to give you this kind of letter that bids farewell. I love you so much.