I've always been the kind of friend who's willing to help out.if someone asked me for a favor, I usually agreed , as long as it was within my power to do so. But I never thought that this created any obligation for me in the future to me,it was just normal behavior among friends.
Recently, a friend asked me for a favor. He said he needed to go to another part of town on business and asked me to give him a ride. He also mentioned that I’d have to wait for him there for about an hour and then drive him back. That meant I’d essentially be tied up for almost the entire day, which really messed up my plans.
I didn’t answer right away at first. I thought about it, and then calmly said that I couldn’t do it this time and declined without any conflict.He said that he had often helped me out in the past and that I could always count on him too.
I replied that yes, it was true that we both helped each other whenever we could, and it was a two-way street, but that didn’t mean I was obligated to agree to every request.
This time, it was really inconvenient for me: I’d have to drive to another part of town, wait there for about an hour, and then drive back, and I just couldn’t work that into my schedule.
After that, he started insisting that it wasn’t such a big request and that I was being selfish. Then he said I’d changed and had become a less reliable friend.
That hurt me because I wasn’t trying to hurt his feelings I just turned him down once in a situation that really didn’t work for me.
And now I feel like I was only a normal friend as long as I agreed to things. As soon as I said no just once,
It immediately became a problem
I honestly don't know if I went to far or I just set a normal boundary.
AITA?