Struggling
So I'm pretty high functioning! I have a full time job where I'm on my feet the whole time. I live alone with a husky. I have a boyfriend and kids, who I spend time with, and then I have friends. I have hobbies that I get to do on occasion.
Writing this out of seems like I have it all and a great life! Which I do! But..... I'm starting to not be able to keep up again. I've had a good year and a half or so! But now it's catching up to me.
My dishes are piling up, there are bills and misc junk on my table, my dog is not getting walks as often, the office in my house is cluttered and impossible and I need it cleaned out so my boyfriend and kids can move in! But I work too much and I'm pretty dead after work these days! I'm overwhelmed and I'm starting to feel like I'm failing at things and that I'm going to end up cancelling plans that I don't want to cancel!
Right now I can't really work less. Like I said I live alone and bills have to be paid. Plus things are kinda crazy at work right now and more often than not I'm asked to work extra. In a few months my boyfriend is supposed to move in and I won't have to worry as much about bills, but then I'll have other responsibilities. It's a light at the end of the tunnel, but the problem is it's so far off and I'm struggling to hard right now!
Maybe I just need to shut up and do what needs to be done, but I'm so tired of faking being healthy! And I can't stop! I'm embarrassed by my house and that I don't shower as often as I probably should, I hate having to take so many pills, and I hate that when I get home all I want to do is cry and pass out! But I have responsibilities!
I don't really know what my question is. Maybe I just needed to vent. But does anyone have any suggestions? I'm getting pretty depressed and miserable. I just want the life I have without pain and exhaustion!