I was sad during my birthday. Maybe partly because I knew na yung childhood yaya ko nasa hospital at the time. Little did I know, she’s already gone. Sinabi lang sakin ng ate ko kinaumagahan. Hindi niya raw sinabi kasi birthday ko.
I thought I was going to be happy on my birthday this year because of a few blessings lately. Finally, medyo nagiging okay na kahit papano sa buhay.
The day before my birthday, my ate messaged me saying nasa hospital nga yung yaya ko. She sent me a photo na naka oxygen and nasa ICU. I was shocked. She’s not that old yet, seemed strong enough pa nung nagkita kami last year. Suddenly, I cried.
I cried because suddenly I realized na di pa pala ako nakakabawi sa kanya. All this time akala ko I give back to the people I love by treating them sa labas from time to time or giving them small gifts during occasions, pero there’s someone I forget to include pala. My yaya. It’s been more than 5 yrs since I started working and yet I can’t remember an event na nilibre ko siya or binigyan ng something.
Nagsend ako agad that day ng pangdagdag sa gastusin nila sa hospital. Konting tulong lang because I know na mahal ang hospital bill nila given na nasa ICU siya.
I can still remember how we interacted for the past few years. We just smile at each other, simpleng kamustahan. About 2 sentences. That’s it. I wish I could tell more about my life to her and vice versa. How I wish I could have spent more time with her nung mga time na umuuwi ako sa’min. Sana hindi ako naging mahiyain to talk to her and gave her something, anything she’ll appreciate.
I wished during my birthday na pagalingin nalang muna yung yaya ko. Saka na yung personal kong wish. But it was too late.