I didn't rlly know what sub to put this in so this is gonna have to do.
So basically I've liked this guy on and off for about 3 years now, and I'm pretty sure he's never actually liked me back. I've never talked or had a conversation with him and everything i know about him I've heard from friends or just gossip.
Lets start at the very start. (this is prolly gonna be REALLY long sorry)
2023: I like him for a little bit at the end of the year. No one knows about this.
2024: At the start of the year I start talking to this guy (we will call him Timothy) we talk for months on end and eventually start dating for 2 weeks and then break it off because we had to date in secret (strict parents) and it was too much pressure. So i start liking him again in like the middle of the year ( we will call the main crush Roger) and some rumors (that my now ex friend spread) went around our school that we were dating, when we weren't.
2025: (this is when most of the drama is)
January-March i don't like Roger yet and more rumors are being spread. April-July i like him a little bit, and am starting to get a bit delusional. August-December I'm falling hopelessly in love with this guy.
His family invites us for new year because our parents are pretty close and we have a lot of the same friends. My friend is begging me to give her his number because Rogers sister (we can call her Wendy) gave it to me a few years ago so me and another friend could do a prank on him. So eventually I caved and gave it to her. She texted him "hey so i know new years is coming up and she's coming to ur house. It would be the perfect time to make the first move" and he replied with " hi my mum is organizing the new years thing so. And I actually don't like her, she is just a friend so please stop talking about this." "Just a friend?" JUST A FRIEND?! I've never talked to the man and he is friend zoning me?! And keep in mind he KNOWS that I like him. His sister even knows!!!
This year (2026):
January: There is a rlly hot day (like 42° Celsius) and his family has a pool so they invited us over with another family that we are also friends with. And Roger was in his room the whole time, I assumed he was taking a nap because of how hot it was outside and there was no other boys. But according to Timothy he was actually trying to avoid me.
February: I find out that Wendy (and ALL of out mutual friends) know and hates me for it but still acts super nice to me. And I'm falling so hard for him
March: I realized that I might actually be in love with him
April: Timothy tells me that there some of my friends were talking crap about me behind my back about how i like him.
My friend (we'll call her Amanda) has 1 class with him and last week she was talking to him and she said "you know you should sit next to her in class next week" (I also have 1 class with him) and he said "but I don't wanna leave my friends." So this week comes around and well he didn't sit next to me or even look in my direction. And that rlly confused me.
Today she had class with him and was talking abt getting married (don't ask she didn't tell me why lol) and she said she already was (as a joke) and he said "oh nice, well I'm not" so she said "don't worry I'm sure u will someday" and he apparently smiled and said "shut up." And tonight she texted him again (she told me dw) because he didnt belive she still had his number saved, and she sent her a picture of her forearm which had a bunch of writing on it about his life so that she could tell me (dont ask pt. 2) and he said "well I don't like her btw."
This was more of a venting post lol
I'm just so confused and don't know what to do. Everyone I've talked to has said to talk to him but I know thats just going to make the crap talking even worse. I really don't know what to do and seriously need some advice.