u/AdmirableCash6

I’ve know this girl for a few years now. Most of it being on and off. One night ago things got to the point where it got violent (the story up on my page on another post) . She punched me in the face multiple times that night and came after me multiple times as well. A couple I was with had to pull her off of me resulting in her fist fighting the other female. The last in person memory I have of her was her punching me in the face and driving off. She even tried to run the other girl over that night. This last morning when she was level headed we said we needed to break up. I showed her the marks she put on my face and told her what she did. She struggles hard with BPD and depression. Shes never had an out burst coming close to being this bad and she’s never hit me before. The thing is is that I just really do miss her. Not only did she physically abuse me but I think I was emotionally abused as well. And I want to know if it’s crazy to have hope that maybe one day, a couple years down the line we could be friends or maybe even try again. It’s hard because I don’t think I’ve fully processed this and I don’t know how to take it all in or what I feel. I just know that I miss her. And I think I need people to tell me what I already know I need to do. I just wish everything played out differently that night. Because this is someone I wanted to be with forever just hours before that.