u/Admirable-Jello-6612

Okay, I need a sanity check here.

I (F) had my avoidant ex blocked for a few months. Recently, I unblocked him—not because I wanted to talk, but mostly to check which mutual friends he was still following so I could block them too. Curiosity got the best of me, I’ll admit. Then I kind of forgot about it.

A few hours later, I went to re-block him… and saw that he had blocked me.

But here’s the thing: in that short window of time, he had posted:

· A few pics of him and a new girl on holiday

· Another picture of them together

· And on LinkedIn, a post about getting a promotion

Like… he blocked me after posting all of that.

If he’s so unbothered, why the performance? Why block me only after making sure I saw he’s “winning” (new girl, new job, vacations)?

And now I’m sitting here like… did we just “break up” again through a mutual block? Is this an avoidant’s way of getting the last word without saying a word?

Would love to hear from anyone who’s dealt with similar avoidant-blocking-after-success-posting behavior. Because I’m not even sad—just confused and kinda fascinated.

TL;DR: Unblocked avoidant ex for a few hours out of curiosity, forgot to re-block him, he blocked me only after posting pics with a new girl and a promotion on LinkedIn. Why the show if he’s over it?

I (30F) was with my ex( 33M) for about 7 months. He comes from money — private school, family inheritance, a cushy government job where he basically does nothing. He spent most of his time sending me photos of himself sunbathing.

The relationship was abusive in quiet ways. He:

· Told me his mother wouldn't accept me because of my background — after we'd already been together for a while

· Blamed me for his erectile dysfunction (needed medication at 30) and said he "could come with his ex so at least he was satisfied there"

· Used his government job as an excuse not to attend a Palestine march, even though my friend who also works in a sensitive role went with no issue

· Watched a popular period drama with me and had nothing to say when I pointed out the absence of Brown people in a show about British wealth built on colonial trade

· Told me he "didn't know what he was doing" in relationships and was too inexperienced to commit (he lost his virginity at 29)

Our mutual friends knew everything about how he treated me. No one checked on me after the breakup.

We broke up after 7 months. He initiated it. I pleaded (yes, embarrassed about that now). Within weeks or months — the timeline is fuzzy — he was with a new woman. She's white, private school, a high-earning lawyer from a wealthy, intact family. His mother approves I’m sure.

They've been together less than a year. They're buying a house together. He's selling his flat — in a down market — even though they apparently didn't need the money for the new place.

He blocked me on everything the moment things got serious with her. When I unblocked him months later (out of curiosity), he re-blocked me within hours.

I found out about the house because I'm still on an estate agent's email list. The listing showed his flat — almost identical to when I was there — but with her photos on the mantelpiece.

I'm gutted. Not because I want him back. But because it feels like the universe is rewarding a racist, avoidant, sexually anxious, mummy's-boy with a "better" woman and a house.

How does he get to win? Why is she being treated better than I ever was? This all feels really shitty and unfair