I (20) struggle with severe Real Event OCD over mistakes I made as a teenager (13-15), I also spend hours daily scrolling social media like Twitter and Reddit and it has severely damaged my mental health to the point that I feel like I could never recover. Social media only hurts me but I still use it daily. I'm terrified I've done something so horrible people would hate me if they knew and Cancel/Callout culture or whatever you wanna call it is extremely triggering for me and It's so common on these sites. I'm so close to confessing on a confession subreddit.
Everything I used to like doing I don't do anymore because of OCD, I wake up and basically only scroll social media. I've almost given up on life and accepted that I'm probably a bad person.
I want to get better but I feel like I NEED to know whether my mistakes are as bad as I'm scared they are or not. I know OCD does this to people but I feel like an exception. I can't imagine I'd ever feel okay with being uncertain. If i were to try to get better, where would I even start?