u/AdComfortable2198

Me and my boyfriend have been together for 1 and 1/2 years and have been doing long distance for a year. Were our eachothers first serious relationship and first long distance relationship. I believe that me and him have a very strong bond, as we’re both very best friends outside of being partners. One little thing is that we’re both very young, so it’s easy to get lost in the little issues.

I enjoy going out to visit friends and family since they all live in a 10 min to 1 hour radius from me. I also go to work of course. But sometimes I would get a really strange feeling from him when I call him after these hangouts or shifts. I asked him last night after weeks of these little expressions. His first response was “it’s a personal issue.”

Trying to explain it from my perspective, he doesn’t like it that I don’t always let him know what I’m doing or if I’m going to another location when I’m out. Since sometimes I get caught up in the moment with family or friends, I forget to update him on location changes. I still check on him and say hi once in a while, but he told me that those occasional “hi’s” leave him bummed out when I stop messaging when I get busy.

I was a bit confused and angry. My personality doesn’t really enjoy being criticized on the way I text, as I always call him at the end of the day nonetheless. Additionally, he also forgets to tell me where he’s going or what he’s doing too, but I have never complained or found an issue with it. We DO have eachothers locations, so I could check it if I really wanted to know.

This lead to a 2 hour discussion, and it left me feeling 100 times worse than before it started. I feel controlled the way I’m being told to communicate with him, but the way he describes not feeling “able to express his feelings sometimes” makes me feel like maybe I should change. I know “controlled” is a big word, but I have trauma, guys. Could I get some advice on how to be a better partner for him? Or maybe what to ask of him?

I have this memory of a music video I found in the mid to late 2010s. It featured this girl in a room of purple or pink monitors stacked on eachother with crosses on the screens. It was an indie song and the singer was female. She wasn’t popular, as I don’t remember any of her other songs getting many views. I remember the video has clips of her outside having a picnic with stuffed animals and then baptizing them in a lake. I feel like there was also a clip of her praying at an altar with (possibly) a rosary in her hands. From what I remember, she had brownish curly/wavy hair and dark eyeshadow. She might’ve been wearing a white dress. I remember these specific lyrics too, “Will I be okay? Will I see your face?” I also remember it being pretty synthy. Please help. I need to kill my curiosity. Thanks!