u/Actual-Psychology958

I (32F) have been with my boyfriend (22M) for a little over a year now. Let's just get over the elephant, I know the age difference is a jump, but I don't think it contributes to this situation. I let it be known how many dogs I had when we started dating, it was five at the time, one has passed away so there are now 4. They range from ages 9-7. With the oldest I'll get three more years if I'm lucky. They are chiweenies and bark a lot, but usually once put to bed at night they are very quiet. My boyfriend has recently quit his job and has been living off his 401k while looking for something new. In the meantime he is spending a lot more time in our home office than normal, this is right by the dog room. Two days ago he got fed up and let them out before I could, i was using the bathroom. Let me preface this by saying he has joked about getting rid of them for about 6 months. When he let them out one of them got super excited and nipped his ankle. There is no mark and he isn't hurt. So this went into that he thinks we should get rid of him because he nipped him. Where I get where he is coming from, that dog is 7 and I've had him since he was born. This just doesn't rise to the occasion for me to see a reason to get rid of him. To me this feels like a way for him to get a dog out without having to look like an asshole for no reason, and I told him that. By the end of the conversation it came down to him asking if I cared more about him or my dogs. Which felt manipulative. Then he told me in not so many words that it was him or them. He said not having them would make him happy. And I pointed out that not having them would make me unhappy. I also told him that if this is something he forces me into I would be angry and resentful and wouldn't feel like I could trust him if he would give out ultimatums like that. He took it back by the next day, but now something feels broke. It feels like something was lost and we can't get it back. I love this man, but im not willing to sacrifice my happiness so he doesnt have to hear barking. How do I explain to him, without minimizing his feelings, how manipulated and hurt I am? And how do we come back from this? Can we come back from this?