I (37F) shacked up with my partner(39M) and a roommate(47M) recently. They are both older men and are starting to have issues with their urine streams and sometimes dribble on the floor. It disgusts me, but everyone is gross sometimes. They clean it up after I
called them gross and I don't think about it much if I can't see it.
2 weeks ago my partner hurt his back and wasn't able to make it to the basement to grab the bathroom shower mat from the dryer. I was away for several nights helping my sister move and couldn't get the bath mat for him.
So instead of asking the roommate for help, he took my organic cotton bath sheet style towel, which is my favorite towel and laid it out on the bathroom floor.
We have a small rowhome bathroom and this towel is so large that he had to fold it twice to fit into the space and it still spilled over in to the area in front of the toilet and got urine dribbles on it. I can't use that to dry my hair now. It's disgusting, and I feel disrespected.
We have *many other towels.* Many of them are raggedy, threadbare, and stained. We have towels that we use exclusively for cleaning. We also have spare kitchen rugs that would have worked in a pinch. He could have asked for help getting the mat from the basement.
I was very angry when I saw my towel used that way. He tried to tell me he's sorry, he had a backache, he'll wash it, he won't do it again...I don't actually care. I'm too disgusted to ever use that towel on my body again, and it was my *favorite* towel. It was more work for him to fuck up my towel that it would have been to just drip water on the floor or use one of the shitty old towels. I'm just mad about it, and I feel disrespected.
I know myself and I know that every time I see that towel for the rest of my life I will be reminded of this incident and it's going to make me angry again. I don't want the towel to be an endless source of resentment. I want to never see the towel again and as long as he never does something like this again, I won't think about it again.
He says I need to just wash the towel and "let it go."
For me "letting go" means letting the towel literally go. In the trash.
He suggested repurposing it for cat messes, and I suggested donating it to a cat rescue.