Guys, I have an insanely high sex drive. I've intentionally deprived myself of having sex with women for more than 3 years now. This is a decision that I constantly scrutinise as I fear that I'm abstaining from sex and all forms of sexual activity during the peak of my sex drive. And the only reason why I haven't succumbed to my desires is simply because of the consequences. I'm scared of making a baby with the wrong woman, I'm scared of catching an infection, I'm scared of falling for the wrong person because I'm a really sensitive man, but most of all I'm scared that if I folded it would come back to haunt me later in my life and I don't want that because I wanna get married one day.
I think about sex all day, every day. If I'm not working on ridiculously hard engineering problems the only thing that circulates my mind is sex. I love beautiful women, I love a woman's naked body, I love boobs (all sizes I think), I love bums, I love the sound of a woman moaning when she plays with herself, I love the sounds a wet pussy makes. I love seeing a moist vagina, I love when she's so wet and you can feel it through her panties. I miss the tastes of a wet, clean pussy. I miss swallowing it. I love when they bend over. I'd love to fuck a hairy pussy one day. I'd love to be surrounded by multiple naked women in one room. I would love to watch multiple different women eat each other out in real life. I love a woman with big round breasts and veins popping out like goulda cheese. I wanna fuck Athena from god of war and drink her blood. I wanna fuck all the pornstars I had a crush on when I was a teen. I'm hard from the moment I wake till the moment I fall asleep.
That's how I feel and these are the things that go through my mind when I'm not working or studying. I could do all these things but I can't because I don't want to, it's not me. This is not a cry for help. And no, I'm not lonely or some kind of incel. I knew abstaining from sex would be hard but it's just gotten even harder as time goes on. I'm surrounded by and friends with beautiful women with most of them trying to seduce me, to break my streak. 😭😭 But again, I can't fold... I'd be doing a huge disservice to the kind of man I want to become.
I don't really know what the point of all this was but if you're going through something similar...