Feeling horrible is who I am now
She got a great job and quickly realized she could get attention from high achieving men. I was no slouch, super involved as a dad and husband, but never a high earner. She quickly fell for one of them and just like that, I lost my wife and half the time with my child.
I’m a week past finalization and about 4 months past D-Day. I do everything right, sober, lift weights, walk a lot, talk to people, take meds. But this horrible feeling hasn’t left me for a second. It’s become a part of me. I’m too weak for this much grief.
She was sometimes controlling and verbally abusive. Even psychologically abusive in the end. But that family was everything to me. I feel empty and hopeless. I’ve called 988 a few times. But I don’t really want to live anymore