u/According_Friend_743

my older female cousin sexually assaulted me from when I was 5-8 and she was about 16-18. i see her at family events still and it makes me nauseous and overheat but i also think about her constantly and cry because she doesn't like me like that anymore. i tried to commit suicide when she showed up with a boyfriend when i was 13. idk i feel like a failure im so dysfunctional i cant be normal and my familys homophobic and conservative so i can't really open up to them nobody would ever understand