Yesterday, me, my boyfriend (who we'll call Mike), and our friends decided to grab lunch together to celebrate our 2nd year anniversary. Mike was the perfect boyfriend, even tho we met through an online blind date arranged by our common friends, he always made it into a point to treat me nicely and communicate with me calmly. But everything literally came crumbling down on me yesterday at our lunch celebration with our friends.
The first time we celebrated our anniversary last year, we made it into a promise to celebrate each year of our relationship with each other alone but our friends decided to arrange a celebratory lunch for us this time. Naturally, felt thrilled to celebrate with them since they were the ones who set us up on an online blind date during the pandemic which is where our relationship started. They were so supportive ever since, they even paid for the reservation and food to make this special for us.
It was in the middle of the lunch when this happened, his other friend cleared his throat and looked at Mike meaningfully. He then reached for something underneath the table and gave me a small box containing a dainty gold necklace with a diamond heart pendant in the middle that I've been eyeing since I saw it at the mall the last time we went out shopping together. I was so happy that I hugged him so tight and kissed him, because of how thoughtful he was and how beautiful the necklace was. I was literally so shocked and giddy. I felt so happy by then that I then told him that he was not the only one with a gift and I grabbed the book I wrote and bookbinded for him and for our anniversary.
Earlier last year I started composing a book inspired by our story. I planned to give it to him on our 2nd anniversary as a way of remembering and cherishing our bizarre, rom-com love story, and some few poetries in there, focusing on the things in our relationship that only us knows about like our inside jokes, experiences, challenges, and how much I love and adore him as a person. This was all dedicated to him.
I handed the gift to him and told him how much I love him and our table was so noisy from all the squealing and cheers from our friends. I was so excited to give this to him because I was so proud of my work and I poured my heart out into this gift because I genuinely loved him and everything about him. I spent my time proofreading and rewriting each page to make it perfect but all he did was look at my gift with a "wtf is that?" Kind of face.
He then proceeded to ask me how much my gift is and bragged that he bought the necklace from a very expensive brand, he told me that he was disappointed at my gift and that I am embarrassing myself. He proceeded to criticize the book's interior and exterior design saying that it looks wonky and that I shouldn't force myself to do things I clearly have no talent for. Then he bragged about his gift to our friends which made me feel so sick and ashamed of my gift, and also shocked because my bf seemed like another person back there. He was always the soft-spoken one and seeing and hearing him insult my love for him crushed me.
They all stayed silent and watched him as he yapped and yapped about my book that I just ended up grabbing my book and started walking out of the restaurant, straight to my apartment.
He and our friends has been texting me and I haven't answered anyone yet. One of his text said that he was just looking out for me and didn't want me to embarrass myself in front of our friends.
I just felt so small and stupid for making handmade gifts when I know that I am not an artsy person and I felt embarrassed and sad about how he humiliated me back there. I mean, the book didn't have a fancy exterior, that's true. But what hurts more is the fact that he insulted it immediately without even looking at what I wrote in there first. This has been weighing me down since yesterday and I thought maybe sharing this here will make me feel better. Thank you reddit, I hope everyone is having a great new year :)
Edit: Thank you guys for all the messages you sent me, they gave me some Ideas and validated my feelings and for that I'm very thankful about. I'm going to break up with him today. I followed one of the comments and sent him the necklace back. He called me and he was crying, asking me if I'm throwing out his love for me. I literally almost broke out of the phone to punch him, I was so angry. He did that to me and now that he tasted his own medicine he's gonna be mad about it? He said that I can't break up with him over the phone and I think he's going to force himself to my apartment, so I tried calling some of our friends for help.
When they arrived they hugged me and sat me down. Apparently our friends, also aren't contacting him and told him to get lost and that they were never friends after that. They also came over with some of my favorite foods and all comforted me, saying that they thought he was great because he used to be such a green flag. They also told me that I have nothing to be embarrassed about because all he did back there was humiliate himself not myself. They will be staying with me throughout the night to keep me safe from him and if he tries anything weird and aggressive, I know a lawyer friend so I am gonna be okay. Thank you everyone for your help and time to read this. I am thankful for all of you :(