i (f19) have never had luck with men, i’ve had one long term boyfriend when i was in highschool and 2 short lived situationship type things. all of whom didn’t treat me very well.
my first relationship ended because we were in different places in life which is fair, he had a lot of insecurities with me going to university and working while he wasn’t doing either of those things and he chose to end it, i’m not overly mad at him because it was a few years ago now and i’ve moved on.
but the 2 short lived situationship things ended because both of them “didn’t want anything serious” after dating me for atleast 3 months each.. and i just don’t know what im doing wrong :(
i got into one when i first started university in 2024, he was in my year and seemed really nice! we went on a few dates and went to a few freshers events together and one day out of the blue he invites me out on a walk and tells me he’s not ready for a relationship, the kicker though? he was in a committed relationship the next week.
the second was this year, i took a long break from dating because i thought it just wasn’t for me, i assumed no one would be interested so i didn’t bother. a friend encouraged me to download hinge just to see what was out there and i met a guy, also goes to my university and i genuinely thought he was great! smart, kind, and everything i wanted. we dated for 3 nearly 4 months and every date felt like my own little fairytale and he also said he wasn’t ready for anything serious.. after talking about meeting my pets, my friends and my family and talking about me meeting his friends and family.. the trips we’d take and asked me about my future plans, kids etc.
im talking to a new guy right now, it was going great but all of a sudden he’s stopped responding while talking to other people and being active on social media, supposed to go on 2nd date tomorrow and literally nothing has been planned or confirmed, despite me trying to set something up.
i feel so disgusting and unlovable every time this happens, it feels like there’s something wrong with me and i don’t know what.. i’m no 10/10 but im not hideous either, im not overweight, i have a job, im in the middle of getting a degree, i have hobbies, great friends and so much love to give. i just genuinely cant understand why this keeps happening to me? i feel like ill never find a relationship, no one approaches me or is remotely interested in me unless i initiate on a dating app. any advice welcome please, i need unbiased honest opinions, my friends all say it’s not my fault and any guy would be lucky to have me and “it’ll come when i least expect it” but i hate when people say that, i want to be loved, i dont want to sit about waiting for it.