Am I crazy? Notes List
[24M] and [23F] of 8 months, bf
We hit it off immediately and things were going perfectly. I felt we were honest and straight up about everything we talked about - and that’s how we got to be so close. In one of our earliest conversations, she said her body count was 5, and I told her mine (higher but not by much).
Months later, I happened to be playing games on her iPad and I got curious. Way worse than expected but I suppose that’s everyone’s experience. One thing has stuck with me. I found a list of 12 names, all with 1-10 ratings, and it even included her hyper-gay ‘bestfriend’ from high school. That last part just made me feel gross..
I took her out to dinner and I brought up the situation. During this conversation, she promised (swore on her family, etc) that it was just a list of guys she’s KISSED, and that what she initially told me was still true. I let it slide, which is unusual for me.
A month later, I find myself getting that pit in my stomach when I think about it. A mix of 10 bodies in high school (*I know it had to be before college) and the fact she could have lied and doubled down on it.
What are the odds she has told me the truth from the start and list is just a “kiss” list?