A
I feel like it's best to disappear I have been feeling lost this past months I thought I was getting better but it seems I was just trying to convince myself otherwise. I have been staying home,I lost my job that's not actually bad coz am actually glad I did . I didn't like working there but I think all my sister cares about it's the money I make she was only good to me when I was working every time I get paid she asks how much I have been paid and she always wants like 90 percent of it am I okay with it I don't know can I act up I can't,she was always there when I was growing up paid for my school fees and everything one time she told I need to pay every penny.know I feel like I owe her my life. My mental health has been getting really bad but I don't think anyone cares I feel like soon I will do something bad I have been thinking people say suicide is a permanent solution to temporary solution for me I don't think of it that way.i think it quiets down everything and that's all that Matters.i have stopped caring what people would feel if am gone like once they said they would cry for a few days and then forget me and that's okay I already knew I wasn't important to anyone. I thought I had friends I was special to them the way they were to me but no they have people who are special to them but it's not me. So what's the point of staying