Advice needed
Hi everyone, I am a 23F born and raised in the UK. I’m currently going through a breakup (24M) and need advice. The relationship was 4 years long and our families met and we were said to be engaged soon. From the beginning I was honest about my past to him. He had not been in a relationship previously, but he lied that he was in an attempt to get the truth of my past out of me. But I wouldn’t have lied regardless, and probably wouldn’t have continued the relationship if I knew he hadn’t been in a relationship before. Either way he said he would accept it. But he soon started getting upset that I had male friends (I was 19 at the time), the way I dressed, etc. A month into talking he found messages with one of my friends of us flirting (these messages were long before I met him), but I admit I was still friends with him (not hanging out), but he was still added on instagram. I didn’t have any bad intentions but I understood how it looked, so I blocked the friend and removed any male I had on social media whether it was from childhood, etc.In the first month there was also an incident where I went to a get together at uni and someone I had been with in the past ended up being there. I messaged my partner to tell him, and asked if he felt more comfortable if I left. He got mad that I should’ve known to leave.I stopped talking to the male friends, changed the way I dressed, etc to make him more comfortable, and I felt it was the right thing to do. However throughout the relationship he would always bring these two incidents up, and never fully got over them. I was loyal to him, and tried to work through the problems because I felt that yes I made a mistake but I never had any bad intentions, i just didn’t understand his boundaries that early into the relationship. He made mistakes too in different ways, but i’m highlighting mine because he couldn’t get over them.Throughout the relationship during fights he would throw it in my face that he spent money on me buying food and gas and what did i do for him. When i would suggest sharing expenses for dates he wouldn’t let me go through with it. I was a college student and tried to cook for him whenever i could, and meal plan so he didn’t have to worry about cooking. Anything he had a problem with about me,I tried to fix because I thought in a relationship you try to become better for the other person. but he always held my mistakes over me and although i learned and changed, he either didn’t see it or still just cared that I made the mistake. He had a rough childhood, and I tried to make him happy and do things for him he didn’t get when he was younger. During fights though he was just shut down. Anyways we broke up about a month ago because we got into a fight and he just snapped and ended it. I’m completely heartbroken. I’ve been trying to turn to waheguru, listen to paath, etc. but i feel depressed and don’t know how I will move on. I keep thinking we were going to get engaged soon and get married, and how did i end up here. Am I in the wrong? is there anything else I could’ve done? He told me he never loved me and doesn’t care about me at the end, but I don’t know it was to detach. I’m trying to turn to sikhi to get over this. Any advice would greatly be appreciated.