My online boyfriend is guilt tripping me.
For some context I am a 25(F) he is a 26(M), I met this guy online a couple months ago and we really hit it off. I told him about some of my fears, and my background (S/A) and told him I might have a hard time going to visit him. He said that was alright and he'd wait months if not years for me to know that he's safe.
Well time skip to a month ago, I was supposed to visit but had medical problems, where there was a chance that I might not be able to walk properly and feel powerless. We'll he said it was alright and he could just come down. I felt uncomfortable with that. While I know it's shitty that I think there's a chance something can happen to me and he might do something, I have reasons for these fears. He said it's fine and I can just reschedule another time. So we stuck with that. But lately it's just been "she didn't want to come see me", "now I have to tell everyone your not coming", "You don't love me because you won't see me"", to him pleading for me to go see him. While some of it's died down he started saying stuff like "she's never going to come see me", "she's not going to ever come down", "we won't ever meet", "Your too pussy to come down" And yes I understand the frustration and I have talked to him about how it makes me uncomfortable when he says things like that to his friends while I'm on call. "It's just a joke", "I'm kidding I won't do it again". Well no matter how much he says it, it won't stop.
Of course I want to see him, and I'm allowed to have every right to be scared. The situation sucks but all of these comments hurt. But it just keeps going. What do I do. It's getting tiring.