Hard to move past this one
I don’t even know where to start anymore. I’ve been with my wife since I was 18, and I’m 31 now. I know she struggles with confidence and how she feels about her body, even though I genuinely tell her all the time that she’s beautiful to me in every way.
But her self-esteem issues have affected our sex life for years. Honestly, it’s been this way since we were probably 21. We’re intimate maybe every other month, it’s always the same routine, and most of the time she seems completely uninterested. After a while, it makes me feel rejected and unwanted.
I take care of myself, stay in shape, work hard, and do everything I can to provide for us. She even tells me sometimes that I’m the perfect husband. But despite that, I still feel like something is missing.
We have this conversation a couple times a year. She says things will get better, and for a while I convince myself to stop thinking about it and just move on. Then eventually it builds up again until we end up fighting about it.
At this point, it feels less like she wants a husband and more like she wants comfort, stability, and a roommate. We argued about it again this morning, and even though we talked it through, I can’t shake the feeling anymore. Part of me is honestly starting to wonder if I should leave.
I give her everything I have emotionally. I love her fully and try to show it constantly, but it doesn’t feel like I get that same love back in the way I need it. I know I deserve to feel loved too, but honestly, I don’t even know what that’s supposed to feel like anymore.