I’ve had depression for a while, anxiety since I was 8 years old, tried antidepressants at 16, made my sleep worse, and anxiety even worse.
We all have a similar sentiment, life feels pointless.
I have no goals, no desires, no hobbies, and no friends. I’m a pessimist.
I have this reoccurring thought of just leaving all my things behind and just walking in one direction till I pass. My life is crumbling and I feel empty.
I don’t ask for help, ever. It must be my ego or pride, or I just don’t care enough to ask.
My whole life I’ve been this aloof guy. I show up and I leave.
I want to experience life, but not through my own eyes. I’m a boring human being, and I think that contributes to me not making any friends, because I feel like I’m not worth the trouble of becoming a friend, my only hobbies are weightlifting and reading, but more often than not I am just laying on my bedroom floor.
All of this, yet I don’t want to die.