Hello all,
I'm seeking beta readers for the prologue and first chapter of my completed manuscript, The Deep Ages.
Blurb:
Ridney the necromancer wanders the fringes of civilization, reanimating the dead to ward off bandits and beasts. But the demon that’s hunted him for years is immune, and has cornered him against the sea. Losing hope, Ridney flees across the waves in a desperate attempt to shake his pursuer forever.
But days after leaving the demon behind, Ridney’s ship is ambushed by a hostile navy. As he plummets to the seafloor inside wreckage impervious to the sea’s crushing weight, he learns he’s not alone. Hidden in the wall is Espaneen, the woman wanted for slashing the throats of several kings with a kite. When they’re rescued by a secretive kingdom living in shipwrecks on the seafloor, their fates become intertwined.
As they learn their ship was sunk to bring slaves to a rebel intent on overthrowing the queen, the demon catches him and reveals the rebellion’s outcome will have devastating consequences for all demonkind. Ridney faces a choice: gain his freedom by fighting alongside Espaneen, or rein in the kingkiller before she destroys everything his rescuers have built. If he chooses wrong, the upper world will learn of magic buried in the seafloor the kingdom protects. And with Ridney the only one who can wield it, the new and remaining monarchs will stop at nothing for his loyalty.
Content Warnings: violence, murder
Genre: Commercial fantasy thriller
Style: Prologue: Third Person Present. Chapter 1: First Person Present.
Feedback I'm Seeking:
Line edits welcome, but also answering the following questions.
Does the prologue make you want to keep reading, or does it feel unnecessary?
Does chapter 1 make you want to keep reading?
How is the pacing? Are there any places that distrupt the pacing?
Are there any places that feel like infodumps?
Anything confusing?
Timeline:
Flexible, but preferably two weeks.
Available to swap opening pages!
Interested?
Please DM me with your email address and I'll share a google doc with you. Thanks!