u/404_dinostat

Well everyone, we've made it to yet another week and another GR episode. As always, welcome back for those who keep up with my posts every week and welcome if you're new here! I think the focus of this episode was on Bambi (with some drama going on between the others of course), so hopefully I can unpack some things. I didn't get much sleep last night so wish me luck now that I can still string my thoughts and words together lol.

Prim, Bambi + Airy

We finally learned what Airy's connection is in this episode - I mean, most of us knew already (or at least speculated) that she was Zee's ex and had some pent-up aggression towards Bambi, but now it's officially been confirmed. I'm going to split the big scenes out here:

The accident scene with Airy was honestly a good scene. She calls Prim saying that she's been in some type of a car accident and P says she'll come to her to help with things. I'm not sure whether she was counting on Bambi tagging along, or if she adjusted her plan on the fly when she saw that she was there. Either way, her behavior in this moment shifts from being heavily suspicious to explicitly hostile. Now grief is an odd phenomenon and it doesn't always make sense - in Airy's mind, Bambi is at fault for all of the loss and pain that she's experiencing. Zee loved Bambi, Bambi used Zee, Bambi caused the fight, Bambi caused the accident, Bambi k*lled Zee. Even though she knows that Bambi didn't cause the accident, she still chooses to place the blame on her. It's a driving factor, she's using her as a punching bag. So naturally, Airy weaponizes this moment and uses it to her advantage. She asks "have you ever been in a car accident?". Shots have been fired. Panic tries to pry the door open and it succeeds. This is the first time Prim truly sees the extent to B's trauma, and she slips up (probably a good thing though to be honest). As she's trying to calm Bambi down, who’s on the verge of having a panic attack, she says "I know this triggers your trauma", to which Bambi asks "What do you mean?", to which Prim then replies "Zee's friend told me everything". Now we're in deep water. Remember when these two were eating together at that food truck and P asked B why she still wanted to be with her if she didn't think she'd changed? Bambi just replied "I don't know", but in a previous post of mine I gave my two cents on how packed that line was. Part of it was that there is this lingering thought in Bambi's head that asks "What if Prim only wants to be with me because I'm broken?". And here we are. To Bambi, love is fragile. It's conditional, something that has to be earned. Something that she can lose by being too much. But Prim knew everything this whole time? She knew about the accident and her trauma? Her final thought: Prim didn't choose me because she loves me, she chose me because she pities me. It's her worst fear. Being "loved" out of obligation. Does Prim really love her? “I don't want your sympathy, I want you to love me". It packs a punch and leaves a sting. Or an open wound.

And I have to take a moment to talk about Film’s acting. She’s truly talented. This scene actually sent me straight back to May and Ai Oon’s separation scene, which tore me to shreds. Film is so special.

Now, I think I've mentioned before how calculative Airy is. Quite literally in everything she does, so this is just the cherry on top. Airy crashing Bambi’s launch event for her clothing brand was probably one of the best ways to destroy her. She is simultaneously exposing what happened between Bambi and Zee to everyone and destroying her career. Which, we'll see if that actually happens, but it definitely could go that way. Airy is doing this on Bambi's day: her friends, colleagues, her industry, the press, everyone is there. She wants to be the center of attention? Airy gave that to her. I mean, dumping a glass of champagne on her is one thing, but what she says is in a completely different league: How many exes have you k*lled? M*rderer. Airy isn't just exposing the accident — she's weaponizing it (again). It's capitalizing on Bambi's trauma, guilt, reputation and fear. And the article that is released as she is walking out of the room? Insane.

I do have to apologize for my analysis on B's mom early on — my opinion that she created a very specific environment for Bambi's childhood still stands, as I do believe that it impacted her somewhat negatively, but I have been framing her as a terrible person this whole time, responsible for all of the bad things happening to Bambi when in reality that's just not true. We learn that she had evidence of the accident being Zee's fault and not Bambi's, but B didn't want it to be released because she didn't want Prim to feel guilty. I think this ties the timeline together for me: Prim and Bambi broke up, Bambi dated Zee to get over Prim, they got into the car accident, Bambi went abroad and then came back unannounced. I think that's what I originally thought but things got fuzzy for a bit so I questioned it. Bambi not wanting her mom to release the video is actually really sad considering who she is at her core. She asked for this not because she wanted to protect herself, but because she wanted to protect Prim from feeling guilty about what happened. She's self-sacrificing. If we're being honest, Bambi has always taken the blame in almost every situation: she takes the blame for the accident, she takes blame for Zee's death, she takes the blame in various fights, she takes blame for misunderstandings, and she takes the blame for Prim's sadness/unhappiness. Her entire identity is built on the idea that if something goes wrong, it must be my fault. So she ends up carrying everything alone. It's sad. I know a lot of people strongly dislike Bambi, but for me, she's one of my favorites. In my opinion, along with Shasha, she's deeply misunderstood. I’m not trying to say that what Bambi did was right, because well… getting in a relationship with someone in an attempt to get over your ex is just wrong and Bambi isn’t excluded from that. But she also doesn’t deserve all of this either. Another thing I noticed actually has to do with Prim. Remember when Prim got upset with Bambi (earlier episode), saying that she's never done anything for her, she's always done things for her own benefit? Yeah, well you can see the sharpness of that statement turn around and strike Prim. After B's mom shows P the video of the accident, I think she realizes that everything Bambi has done has been for her. And Prim wouldn't have even known. That's the realization. That's the look she has after she finds out the whole story.

The apology scene between Bambi and Airy was also heavy. Bambi goes to Airy's apartment (with Prim) and apologizes to her. Ends up getting slapped, but she takes it and tells Prim that it's okay. She thinks she deserves it. She's not just accepting the slap, she's accepting the narrative that she deserves to be hurt. She genuinely believes that she ruins people's lives, that Zee's d**th is her fault, and that she must also earn someone's forgiveness even if she isn't at fault. She's not apologizing to Airy because Airy deserves it - she's apologizing because in her mind, she owes her one. To Bambi, I think dating Zee was the catalyst for everything. If only she hadn't had made this single decision, none of them would be in the position they are in now. So everything is seemingly on her. But it's finally time to let go. "I know it's hard, I've been carrying this guilt all this time. But I can't punish myself more than I already have. We have to move on with our lives." I think maybe Bambi sees parts of herself in Airy — if it was Prim who had died, wouldn't she do the same thing? So I think she's doing this for both of them, even though Airy may not necessarily deserve it. She's not telling Airy to forget Zee or to even stop grieving. It's more like you are hurting me because you're hurting - but we can't stay here forever. Yes, she's asking for forgiveness, but she's also asking for freedom.

Well, as always that was a lot longer than I intended it to be... the thoughts just kept coming I guess. That's the bulk of it though, I don't think I'll have near as much for the other 2 pairs (unfortunately).

Shasha + Gorya, Shasha + Baiper, Go... Gerva + Kris

First of all, this is the greed they talk about in the Bible. I mean seriously, how is it that Love has kissed all 3 of GMMTV's tops in one single series? Anywaysss

Shasha orchestrating this whole thing going on between Gorya and Kris was kind of genius. I think it helped on both ends. For S, she knows she is getting closer to having G. More importantly, Gorya knows where she stands with her. Nothing about Shasha really represents Gorya's ideal type, both in terms of looks and personality (according to her). I think deep down she's in denial that she is in fact her type in various ways, but maybe we'll get to that later. I kind of suspected that Kris was in on some type of wing woman plan like before, so I'm glad it actually went in that direction. It was hilarious to me how Gorya left both Shasha and Kris high and dry, at different points in time, but it was so funny to compare them. I thought it was great how Shash brought Baipor into the mix too - at first I was like "Man... not again", but when I figured out that Baipor was in on the plan as well, I was like… okay this is funny. Still no KrisBaiper but I'm still manifesting that!

Shasha essentially engineered a situation where Gorya had to confront her feelings. Maybe I'm reading into this more than Shasha herself, but if it were me, I would be thinking "Will she choose the safe option or the one she really wants?". Kris is technically a "safer" option — no hidden scandals (I guess we wouldn't know, but let's just pretend this is the way it is), she's available, doesn't seem as player type as Shasha. So yeah, why not? But of course, when faced with this alternative option, she hesitates. Then she makes her decision, which just so happens to be Shasha. When her and Kris were talking, she was asked if there was anything going on between her and Shasha. She says not really, there's something going on but S is always hot and cold with her so she doesn't really know how to feel. At least she knows how she feels now LOL. When the two are talking and Shasha asks if there is anything about her that Gorya likes, G says that she winds her up. S says *shocked face* "I just joke around with you" or something like that. It was funny. I think deep down, winding up = you make me feel alive. Lately, she's been making her laugh and making her feel a bit flustered. She's made her confused, irritated, all the things. I think that's what she meant when she said "You wind me up" but in a good way. Shasha may not be Gorya's ideal type, but she's the one she wants.

Min + Praew

I think Min is finally going to choose Praew above all else. It will be interesting to see what happens next episode and if there is any confrontation with her family, but there are still 3 episodes left so that may come later. There wasn't a ton of scenes with these two and the ones we did get were short. BUT, I think when Min talked with her colleague at the spa (I forgot her name), it really helped clear things up for her and realize that she really wants Praew. In the beginning of the episode, Min says something like she knows what she needs to do to be happy but she's scared to do it. Again, Praew is understanding of the feeling, especially after meeting M's family and experiencing firsthand where her fear is stemming from. Regardless, Min will soon have to make a big decision. Man, it's kind of like a nightmare.

Sorry I'm kind of short changing these two, but we really didn't get any new stuff in this episode. Also admittedly, I'm running out of steam lol.

I hope you guys got something out of this and if you got this far, thanks for reading everything! I truly appreciate it. Can't believe there are only 3 episodes left - we've been in it already for 10 weeks (hiatus week for Songkran)! Time really flies. Anyways, enjoy the rest of your jam-packed week (Hometown, Fulfill, B(O)L, Air4E, Shades, EWB) and let's meet back here again next week :)

dinostat

If you're new here, welcome - this is where I've been writing posts on each new GR episode every week. I thought this episode was great, so hopefully I can come up with a lot of things to say as I go! Let's get into it.

Prim + Bambi (feat. Aerie)

Okay. Prim in this episode gave me strong feelings of banging my head against the wall very frequently. I mean, how can someone be this oblivious? I think the problem is that she's emotionally naive - Bambi even mentioned that when she liked Prim back then, she used to hang around her facility all the time just to try and get her to speak to her, which P didn't even pick up on or know until right now, when Bambi told her. Prim assumes that people just have good intentions and she doesn't (or can't?) read in between the lines when people are being... extra friendly (like Aerie). She doesn't think that people would try as hard to pursue someone as Bambi mentions. For example, B thinks that Aerie is doing all of these things (getting this job under Prim, getting close to Prim) to replace Bambi in some way or to get between them. She's right. But Prim shuts the idea down saying that no one would try that hard for something like this. Which is... wrong. So I'm not sure if there truly is a disconnect or if P recognizes a bit of what Aerie is doing and is just letting it happen. Either way it's not a good look.

Prim is doing 2 things with 2 different people: she's giving Aerie trust, attention and closeness while also giving Bambi reassurance, love and softness. But all of these things shouldn't exist at once. Perhaps the most important thing she isn't giving, is the validation (to Bambi) that she sees/recognizes Aerie's behavior too. As a result of this, Bambi is beginning to feel unheard, dismissed, threatened, jealous, and scared. Because even if Prim is telling her that no one compares to her and that she loves her, if Prim can't see what Aerie is doing with her behavior, things are bound to get out of hand and take a turn for the worst. Love here is not the issue - the question if Prim and Bambi love each other is out of the picture (in my opinion). The real issue is that Prim is too trusting and Aerie is slowly but successfully manipulating and gaining the upper hand in this situation.

Now Aerie is a bit of a mix up. We know that her goal is to seemingly get between P + B, but why? What is her reasoning for it? It could be that she was Zee's ex, but really nothing pointed to that during this episode. A is in a relationship with someone, who she breaks up with in this episode, and that's really all we know about her. Other than that, she's just been bickering with Bambi and trying to get on Prim's good side. I did find it interesting that her break up parallels P + B's breakup: it's her birthday (just like it was Bambi's birthday when they broke up) and her partner didn't seem to give her a reason as to why they were breaking up. This doesn't necessarily relate exactly to P's situation, since Bambi did give a reason for their split, but it does remind me of how B left without reason and without telling anyone.

Now aside from her slightly unclear motives, Aerie as a person, is a bit cruel. She sees Bambi's medication fall out of her purse and hides it behind her foot so Bambi doesn't know to grab it. She also doesn't know that A saw that she is using medication. Aerie now knows that B likely relies on this medication and will become unstable without it. She'll go back to being more emotionally volatile and it will cause tension between her and Prim. She's calculative. And she's destabilizing Bambi. She wants Prim to lean on her instead of Bambi during this "rough" time that will be coming up soon. She's disguising her manipulative behavior with her being kind and supportive. B is right - A is up to something but right now, she’s the only one who sees it.

Shasha + Gorya

The stars of the episode for sure. I have to hand it to Milk for acting the hell out of her scene in this episode. I felt like I couldn't skip it because it's an important part of Shasha's story, but man was it difficult to watch. The fear and guilt that was conveyed during this scene was so intense. I realized I was looking away from my screen at some points, because why did it feel wrong to watch? But it ties everything together for me, in terms of why Shasha is the way she is. It also reminded me of one of the first scenes in the series, where Shasha is doing a shoot and some interns (?) or just workers on set, took pictures of her on their phone and she got very upset. At the time, it just made her seem like she was a rude and out of touch model, but with everything that we know now? It makes sense.

In my previous post, I was hoping that Gorya would find out about everything going on with Shasha's ex manager - I knew Shash wouldn't tell her and would just end up suffering on her own. So I'm glad that Ant stepped in (I assume) and reached out to Gorya. I really loved the scenes between these two - Gorya DOES care about S but there is also a lack of communication here. If Shasha would have been honest about her whole situation, she would have been understanding. The issue was that she just fired her (as directed by her ex manager) and let herself be blackmailed instead.

Which Gorya also stated herself.

Shasha doesn't want the videos to be leaked - she feels that people will look at her as a fraud, someone who is dirty and undeserving of her status. But Gorya doesn't see her like that at all. She tells her that she has made it this far because she's great at being a model and she's deserving of everything she has worked for - she’s earned it. And she doesn’t have to go through everything alone, there are people to support her. Even Prim who isn't necessarily fond of her, is ready and willing to support her. Baipor, who Sha somewhat lead on before, is there to support her. Everyone at Ladybird is there for her. All of her life she's felt like she's never had anyone at all but in reality, they've all been right in front of her. All she had to do was speak up.

Now, I think we need to unpack their last scene because it's a HUGE moment for Sha. In the past, it's always been transactional between these two. In this moment, S could have easily leaned into something more physical, especially with the tension going on. Plus, Gorya opened the door by asking her if she wanted to stay over. But instead of doing what we were all expecting her to do, she simply says "I would like to, but maybe another time. Sometimes having a good conversation and drinking beer is better than sex." She's choosing connection over physical escalation and she's choosing control over her own usual pace. She feels safe with Gorya (G better not ruin it) and doesn't feel like she has to prove anything and she trusts that Gorya won't push her past it. So crazy that after S chasing after her for so many episodes, the moment she can have her, she turns it down. Because the moment was just right, it was just enough. She didn't need anything else. It's like she's finally choosing herself but she's also choosing Gorya. She got the green light, but chose not to rush through it. Shasha is no longer chasing closeness out of fear of losing it and she's trusting (hopefully it's well placed) that Gorya won't leave her. I think she is redefining what intimacy means to her, something that doesn't need to escalate so far for it to be meaningful.

I also want to unpack G's expression when Sha leaves because as always, I think there's a lot more to it. On surface level, it could be seen as surprise or "wait... did she just turn me down?" type of vibe. Which, valid, because from her perspective, this is new territory. Shasha has been the one trying to push forward this whole time so this really is throwing her off. I think it leads more into something like this: Gorya is now having to recalibrate.

Because this isn't the same "game" that they have been playing anymore. In this moment, she was preparing for things to go further (like usual) and she actually gave Sha a window to make a move - but she stopped instead of taking it further. So I don't think the read of her expression being filled with hints of disappointment is wrong, because I do think that feeling was there, but I also think it is more along the lines of emotional whiplash rather than something like her ego being hurt since she lowkey got rejected (LOL). Her reaction time is kind of a lingering one, as in she kind of just stares as Shasha walks away. I think deep down she knows what this means: Shasha just changed the terms of their arrangement and connection.

Based off the preview for the next episode, it looks like things will begin to ramp up between Kris and Gorya. I'm not sure what is going through Gorya’s head - maybe she's being avoidant of her feelings for Sha, which wouldn't be out of the ordinary. Is she leaning into Kris because it seems easier? Less emotional turmoil? Or maybe she's just a distraction. Yet again, things will get worse before they get better. But at least this episode was a bit of a break.

Min + Praew

Honestly... I was really annoyed with Min. I understand her position, but she still treats Praew like crap in most scenarios. P's line to her was so true: "don't make me feel guilty when you can't give me clarity". That's kind of been the foundation of their relationship this far. Min gets upset about something Praew does but then somehow ends up making P feel guilty for "going too far". It's like a vicious cycle. I know this is just a road bump and things will work themselves out, but everything Min said this episode had me shaking my head. And I do know that Praew knew the conditions of this whole situation, but it doesn't excuse the way Min has been treating her most of the time. I do think that after meeting M's family though, it helped P to see what Min is so afraid of. Her family is harsh and very traditional which Praew has now seen firsthand. Min will get the courage, it will just take time. It's a long road, but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, for lack of a better phrase.

Something else that annoyed me was Min’s family — I mean, they annoyed me before but this time they really pissed me off. Praew is trying to “blend in” and be more straight presenting but of course Min’s family still feels the need to bring up if she’s a tomboy which then leads into her telling them that she’s gay. And then of course they press Min AGAIN about why she broke up with Park. They liked him, so why wasn’t that enough? What did she do to make him break up with her? Infuriating. They don’t care at all about Min, they care about looking “normal”, even if it means Min staying with someone who abuses her.

Other than that, not too much to say here. I feel like these two kind of stayed stagnant in this episode, so hopefully there will be more to talk about for next week.

Well, that's all I'll say for this episode (unless people strike up conversations down below!). I'm trying to keep these somewhat short (it's not working) but I just have too much to say and I have too many speculations on everything. As always, thanks to everyone who read all of this, and if you have read any of my previous brain dumps on GRs, an extra thanks to you! Hope to see some of you next week.

dinostat

I don't think I'll do a weekly analysis of this show, just because I am doing one for Girl Rules every week so I don't want things to get too out of hand, but I DO want to talk about the first two episodes of this series because let me tell you -- they're GOOD. I'm not too sure how many of you have seen it yet, so be aware that this post is going to include spoilers.

I know there have been a lot of conflicting thoughts on the premise of this show because it's technically controversial with the whole student-teacher relationship that was displayed, or at least hinted at, in the initial trailer that came out and also in the new one. I think I'll touch on my opinions of this in a bit, but for now I'm going to give everyone a legend since there are quite a few characters who we have been introduced to. Let me just say, I highly recommend watching this series, or at least giving it a shot. It is really well done in terms of the acting, story, and cinematography so far.

Hopefully this is helpful lol

Character Legend:

Nalin: Alumna returning to teach French

Som: Teacher that was fired because she was suspected of making sex tapes (Nalin is her replacement)

Jane: Transfer student, upbeat personality, ambitious, likes to draw/do art

Earn: 4.0 student, quiet, friends with Belle, involved in controversial relationship with previous teacher (Som)

Belle: Outspoken, problematic, trouble maker, likes to sleep with a blanket over her during class, niece of Mother Superior (equivalent to principal of school I think), superior at French

Sophie: Student president, in FWB type situation with Amy

Amy: Player, popular, likes to sing + play guitar, smart but falls behind sometimes because she's involved in many things

Nano: "Boss" of little posse, mean ish but not cruel, has a little spark going on with Jane but also butts heads with her a bit (for now)

I think the focus will be on the characters on the top row on the screenshot I have attached while obviously weaving other characters in as support.

Episode 1 focuses on Jane and gives us background as to why she moved to Bangkok for schooling - she is now living with her father and he is providing for her financially (she moved from Chiang Rai where she lived with her mother, who seemingly carelessly lost a lot of money). Her entry into this school system is interesting and creating waves for sure, specifically with Nano. This is a place where hierarchy matters more than ideas, "alliances" matter more than fairness, and the line between right versus wrong is blurred by loyalty and pressure. So naturally, by Jane being someone who is more optimistic, open, and solution-focused, she is directly contesting this structure that has been established prior to her arrival. And Nano is feeling this. Jane's persuasiveness and determination tend to benefit everyone (or at least the majority) immediately, so the student body gravitates to her ideas quickly. J is kind but I do wonder how long it will last in this environment. Nalin's advice to her, as an aluma, is to always do what is right, even if people are going for what is wrong. Always trust your instinct. I think the thing here will be if she can continue to be good in this type of place, where the right thing won't always be clear and following your instincts and being kind can throw you into isolation.

Episode 2 focuses on Earn and her situation. She is a top student and will be joining Nalin's French club. Her parents are trying to pay for her tuition, but it's expensive and they are already struggling financially. One day they ask her how late the school allows tuition payments because they are short on money. Earn tutors and makes some money off of that, but that alone is not enough to help cover payments. She ends up running into Som (teacher) and they get dinner together. Eventually Earn agrees to make sex tapes with Som because it will make her a lot of money and she needs it to pay for school. Their faces are covered and for the most part it's anonymous but her school uniform can be seen and so students at school start to speculate that one of them is involved with these tapes.

Now, this is controversial. However, it could end up being okay depending on how the show frames it: if they frame it as something that is wrong and as something that has consequences, I think people need to stop being as critical. Because unfortunately, things like this do happen in real life. I'm hoping that this series is able to, in some way, display that institutions (such as the school) sometimes create environments where secrets and power imbalances thrive, and that people either misuse this (Som) or get trapped by it (Earn). It's something that happens because of everything that is wrong with a system. This specific type of storyline can explore all of the dynamics between these characters to show how they are harmful and rooted in bigger systemic issues. But we'll see how they go about it.

My favorite character so far is Belle. She is a troublemaking individual, however she has a stronger moral compass than many other students. She represents autonomy. Overall, her goal is to get out from under her aunt (Mother Superior) and she is fairly defiant and causes trouble in hopes of the higher ups doing something. Expel her or suspend her, send her away, anything. But she has found that no matter what she does, she remains in the same place, which she finds unfortunate. Even though the other students think she's weird, she is kind. When she finds out Earn is the one making the videos, she doesn't shun her or make her feel like she's less. She doesn't equate what Earn is doing with moral worth, as she mentions that she assumes she has her reasons for doing it. She separates who Earn is as a person from decisions she might be making under pressure. They're all in this system together - Belle knows how it can be, even though she might not know E's exact situation right now.

Nalin is also very intriguing. She used to break the rules, yet now she is someone who is in a position of power within that system that she used to keep secrets from. Her conversation with Belle is worth noting because she basically says: rebellion without strategy will get you punished and will take away your freedom. Why draw more attention to yourself by being bad when you can just pretend to stay out of trouble while still getting away with everything? Sounds like she's been there before. And she says it in French. Which it seems is a common thing for her when she wants to say something that she knows could potentially get her into trouble. The dynamic between these two right now seems to be a power exchange. If Belle joins the French club and wins the competition, Nalin will speak with Mother Superior about transferring her to an international school, away from her aunt. If Belle wins, Nalin will get a bonus for contributing to the school's image and the students (which she needs more money for her mom's medical situation). It would be a win win.

Unlike Mother Superior, Nalin's influence is subtle. Her actions so far (with Jane and Belle) have shown that she has influence through guidance, control through information, and protection through positioning. It's the type of power that doesn't look like outright power and it could have a ton of impact as the show progresses. These two are like polar opposites: one shows that the system is heavily flawed, without restraint (Belle) and the other is able to operate within that same system with the power of control (Nalin). She knows it isn't a good system. But she's learned how to exist in it and navigate it carefully. Belle hasn't. It will be interesting to see what happens.

The trailers make it seem like the teacher-student relationship is Earn and Som but maybe not Nalin, but I'm not sure. Someone in the trailer says to Nalin "I think we all know what your type is" or something like that, and I think he was referring to girls and not students. Because for her to like another woman would also be considered as "bad" in this particular setting, so it could go either way.

These are the characters that stood out the most to me thus far, but I won't go into detail that much about anyone else right now. I mean actually, Nano seems to be... interesting? The whole cat thing is suspicious. Her family seems rich but she's asking for money from her friends? She buys a lot of cat food for stray cats she finds on the streets because she feels bad for them, but in the trailer she is taking pictures of what seems to be a bloody cat. Suspicious.

Anyways, I hope you all get the chance to watch this series because I think it will be really good (or I hope it will be). I encourage everyone to try it. I likely won't be doing weekly posts on this series like I do for GRs, but I guess we'll see - if I'm chomping at the bit to get my thoughts out, maybe I will.

dinostat

It's okay go ahead - you can come at me for what I said last week about Shasha and Bambi. I was WRONG, but I so wanted nothing to happen between them. Anyhow… you know what the drill is.

Prim + Bambi

Well... I can't say that I'm surprised but I will say that I'm disappointed in Bambi. It's interesting how the show framed her kiss with Shasha: It was kind of short, it wasn't passionate, Bambi pulled away, and she had a look of guilt on her face immediately after (I would hope so). It's almost like they tried to soften what was happening. But the truth is that Bambi did cheat. She kissed someone even though she's dating Prim, and she did it because she was hurt and wanted to escape her feelings. That's like the epitome of cheating. The only thing that I will say is important to understand here, is that Bambi doesn't actually want Shasha - this situation isn't desire, it's a symptom of her wound. She did this because she's feeling like she's too much and that Prim is tired of her. This has always been Bambi's flaw: she runs from conflict, makes impulsive decisions, and commits various acts in an attempt to distract herself from what she is really running from. If you already hated Bambi's character, this likely pushed you past the point of no return, but I still want to talk about Bambi from a more objective standpoint.

When Prim comes to Shasha's condo to talk to Bambi, I found their conversation to be interesting. Although P just wanted to have a conversation with B about what happened the night before, or why she was at S's condo, I think it made Bambi feel even worse, momentarily. Prim mentions that in the past she thought she understood Bambi best but that sometimes she feels like she doesn't understand her at all. The reason as to why I think this hits hard is because you have to remember that Bambi sees Prim as the one person in the entire world who truly understands her and loves her, so when she says she feels like she doesn't understand her sometimes, B's mind is probably telling her "if Prim doesn't understand me, no one will", "If Prim doesn't understand me, she won't be able to love me anymore", "If Prim doesn't understand me, I'm alone". So basically the majority of her core fears all at once.

Now the lie to Prim I think is what hit me the hardest. I suppose I technically wasn't expecting anything different from Bambi, but hearing her lie out loud to Prim's face did make me flinch a bit. P mentions that she knows her words were harsh, but if B slept with S just to annoy her, that was a bit cruel. Bambi says that no matter how upset she is, she would never do anything to hurt Prim. But the thing is she did hurt Prim, even if Prim isn't aware of what she did. She knows it too. The look on her face when she says this to Prim is evidence of that: it's the moment she realizes that she's lying to the person she loves the most and she's becoming someone who she actually doesn't like. I think P isn't necessarily accusing Bambi of sleeping with Shasha even though she technically did say "If you slept with Shasha just to annoy me, that's a bit cruel". In my mind it was more of a "Please don't run when things between us get difficult", "Please don't leave me behind" type of vibe.

Moving to a sweeter scene, when Prim and Bambi were sitting on the swing at P's house, it made me really happy. I know Bambi is complicated and difficult and does things that don't make sense to a lot of people, but I have to say that I truly appreciated her character in this moment. For starters, she is with Prim because of who she is as a person (as she stated) and not because of anything else. She likes Prim for Prim. I think that's something we can all appreciate. Bambi grew up with wealth, status, and material abundance, none of which ever made her feel loved or seen. It's empty to her and doesn't really hold any value. Prim's world is different - her family doesn't have a ton of money and she wasn't born into a high social status or anything like that. Her world is smaller, but it's real and has a sense of warmth, belonging and affection. Something that I think Bambi has always wanted. So even though P's house isn't a mansion and she doesn't have money pouring out of her fingertips, she can give Bambi the love and affection she craves. And the reindeer pouch? I thought this was a great scene. P gives B a reindeer pouch because it reminded her of Bambi. She was going to give it to her on her birthday, but that was the year they broke up so she never gave it. When she gives it to B now, she loves it. Not because it's expensive. Not because it's fancy. She loves it because it's thoughtful, it's personal, and it's from Prim. It symbolized being seen.

I also thought their conversation here was worth noting - Bambi tells Prim that she'll change so that P can be happy, but P tells her that she doesn't need to change herself. She just wants communication from her when things get difficult between them. And she says she doesn't need to keep trying to make her happy because they should be happy together. The thing is, I think B wants to change even though P says she doesn't need to. Kind of ties back to her conversation with Shasha about changing for someone, which I think implied the idea that Bambi is wanting to be better for Prim because she cares about her so much (also kind of ironic since she cheated on her right after this lol). Bambi also feels a bit guilty about giving Prim's father money after she finds out what her father has done (new wife and son). Again, her heart was in it but the execution wasn't there.

Shasha + Gorya

First of all, Shasha's backstory is actually a lot darker than I thought. Nothing is explicitly stated, but I feel like it's definitely implied that Shasha was involved in some sort of exploitative or coerced situation when getting into the entertainment industry. Of course it could allude to multiple things, but it might be along the lines of being pressured into a casting couch type of situation or being taken advantage of early on in her career in a way that wasn't consensual or fair. Maybe it will be expanded on in the future, I have a feeling it will, but right now I think the main point is that whatever her past is, it's likely something the public would judge harshly and her ex manager is weaponizing it to control her and benefit from her, once again. Clearly it's part of her past that brings feelings of shame and fear, not something that Shasha wants to revisit, so the fact that her manager is blackmailing her with it is cruel in my opinion. AND she's asking for 50% which is ridiculous. As if she wasn't already scamming S before. AND she is making her fire Gorya. IMMA START WINDING UP. Seriously though, I hope that Gorya doesn't just take this situation at face value and figures out what's really going on, for both of their sakes.

Now S and G, it's sad that we now have this giant roadblock just when things were starting to progress with these two. Of course Gorya is trying to play things off as if she still wants nothing to do with Shasha, but she ends up contradicting herself and breaking her own rules. But I guess everyone is doing that. She tells Gorya that if she wants her to be her manager, things need to be strictly professional: no hugging, no kissing, no fwb, none of it. But then all of a sudden they're in a store together, music is playing, and they start to dance. And Gorya actually... smiles? She laughs? She looks like she's enjoying herself and Shasha's company? Sigh, and now it's all about to be ruined.

Quick little detour (going back to the beginning of the episode), when S and B are talking at her condo, B asks her if she's ever met anyone who has made her want to change. The look on her face clearly says yes, but she ends up saying no and that she's not ready to change for anyone. Just a random thing I remembered just now.

Anyways, I think with these two, it's a slow road to admitting that they like each other. For S it's maybe a bit closer, but neither of them are willing to admit to themselves that they like each other and care about one another. But it's evident. For example, Shasha is in a bind with an event in her schedule that she didn't know about and starts to panic a bit. Gorya says she can help and ends up styling her AND going to the event with her, neither of which she had to do. Then at the event, reporters start pounding S with questions about her manager and she gets overwhelmed. G sees it and helps her get out. Then the whole lamp store (I think it was a lamp store? Or antique type of store). She (somewhat reluctantly at first) dances with S and they just have a little conversation on a couch together. S might not know it, but the way she looks at Gorya while she speaks? Man, I wish I had someone who looked at me like that LOL. Homie is down bad.

I think the next episode is looking a bit rough, just because of the manager blackmailing Shasha. I think it could potentially drive S and G's relationship into the ground, but we'll have to wait and see what happens. Obviously every week we hope for the best but prepare for the worst.

Min + Praew

I was really happy that we got more information about the dynamic of Min's family. However... it's looking complicated. You win some and you lose some, what can I say. Min and Praew ran into Min's uncle at a furniture store. He saw the two of them hugging and asked if M was still dating Park but she tells him no. Which, by the way, this felt more like a threat as opposed to an actual question. He's not just being nosy - he's reminding her of what her role is "supposed" to be in their family which is to get married and have children.

Min is scared of her family. It makes sense why she doesn't visit home often - it feels suffocating, judgmental, and full of expectations that seem impossible. They don't see her, they just want her to play the role she's supposed to. Even though Park wasn't a good guy, they looked right past it. In their eyes, they just saw it as an opportunity for Min to get married and have kids. Maybe they view her as more of an accessory than their own family who they should care about. Her mom tells her to not be the one who disappoints everyone in the family, alluding to her suspicion of her relationship with Praew based off what the uncle told her. Reminds me a bit of Prim's parents in PL but I don't think anyone will live up to the atrocities of that. I also think things will get worse next episode between these two as well, just because Praew is starting to feel more and more like someone Min is trying to hide all the time and I think it will push her over the edge soon. Even though she really likes Min, I think part of her is waiting for M to be comfortable just... being. She also doesn't know everything that's going on with M's family though so it's a tough situation from both sides. She agreed to this, but it's becoming more and more difficult and I think we'll see the result of that during next episode.

Eventually Min is going to realize (I think she already knows) that she can't have Praew AND also hide her from her family. Which sucks because now we're getting into "you have to choose" territory. So I guess it will come down to how bad she wants it and how much courage she's willing to have. Scary stuff.

Bambi + Aerie

Okay so... the interaction between these two was weird. Weird as in I feel like I got 3/7 random pieces of information and tried to make sense of the entire story. It wasn't casual or friendly. It seemed calculated and territorial, way too intense if this was their second time meeting. Aerie clearly knew of Bambi beforehand (before the badminton interaction), but we don't know why yet. Theory still stands that Aerie is Zee's ex and she's now out to ruin Bambi's happiness. What was really off was when A grabbed B's arm. It was a bit aggressive, it was sudden, and it was intrusive. It startled Bambi because it wasn't appropriate. Aerie covers it up with a question of where Bambi got her outfit and then proceeds to take pictures of Bambi. I think she's testing the waters. She's trying to read B's behavior, her emotional state, and her confidence. She's not as fearful, as emotional, or as chaotic as the others. She's strategic. And her plan is about to work, for now. Regardless, something is off about her and the interaction was honestly kind of unsettling.

Well... the lie for each person is different.

Bambi literally lied to Prim.

Shasha and Gorya are lying to themselves.

Min is lying to her family, or more so just not addressing her situation to them.

We have 5 episodes left. It will be interesting indeed to see how everything plays out. I have refrained from reading the novel so I will continue to know nothing about the future that lies ahead. We'll meet up again next week - thank you to everyone who read!

dinostat