to preface this, im FtM and shes MtF. we're both young, but not under the age of consent.
My girlfriend is quite horny. she cant help it. I am the opposite, kind of. I have trouble with intimacy because I get really bad bottom dysphoria (surgery is out of the question for the moment for monetary reasons, its a long-term goal). weve been together a year, but havent had sex yet. ive given her oral but thats the furthest its gone. she wants to give me oral, i am rarely comfortable with it because of my equipment. she wants me inside her somehow- fingers, strap, ideally both. im not quite comfortable with this.
I am not meeting her needs. she gets frustrated and sometimes lashes out because she gets impatient. I cant blame her. she doesnt want me to push myself for her, and nor do I obviously, but my last long-term relationship ended because their needs werent met and they found someone who could meet them better than I was, even if they swore up and down that they loved me and it wasnt an issue. im scared this will end the same way. I dont want to lose her, but i dont want to make myself uncomfortable for her sake, either. what do I do?