I found out about 18 months ago that my (30f) husband (33m) had been cheating for at least 18mo. I only found out because he was being blackmailed and i saw weird transactions on our bank account. He was going to let me go to the bank and report the transactions until i went through the walmart app and saw some of his recent purchase history. We had been worrying about how to pay bills and he was taking money from us to give to her.
I have been with him for 16 years this year. We have an 8 year old. I wanted to make it work so i stayed. About a week or 2 after i found out, i went through his phone and found more. Then a few months later, found even more. After processing, I told him i wanted a divorce and we were figuring all of that out and all the sudden he started trying and was doing better for our relationship. I checked his phone and didnt find anything...so i tried to see what would happen.
I am currently 7mo pregnant and he has been acting weird lately. So i checked his phone last night for the first time in at least a year. Found that there are several women, one of them being the girl that blackmailed him. Their messages on this specific platform (which he would download and delete every day) go back to 2024. This isnt even the original platform he was using when he was caught. So it was just something i hadnt found and he kept hidden.
Ive been a SAHM for 8.5 years now. I have no money or career. Im pregnant and cant even legally divorce while pregnant. Im more stuck than ive ever been. And im angry. I asked him if why me being pregnant didnt make him want to stop. He said "i never wanted a second baby anyway."
I should have left the first time.