When I married my husband he was getting off nicotine with vaping & successfully got off. So, I married him because we fell in love. But after giving birth to our twins, I went into a psychosis. My husband stayed and supported me through it. Though he complained and guilt tripped me the entire time, he did stay, be supportive, and helped out a lot with the kids. After I got better, started working and being an active member in the family, my husband fell into addiction. He started smoking in 2023 & is still on zen pouches with no thought of stopping. Then there was the ourageous gambling where in 1 week he went to the casino 3 times. We had to declare bankruptcy over it. Also, he started taking oxy to manage his nuropathy pain, but on top of that he started doing alternative drugs to stop break through pain. He is a Veteran and I get he has PTSD. But I feel like I am just going to work to pay for his addictions. When I spoke with my husband about it he said, "Most husband's would have left their wives when they had mental health problems, but I stayed. So keep putting up with me." On multiple occasions he has had me cover for him about his addictions and gets paranoid over it. He has also lied to me about where he is going on a few occasions.
tl;dr
I love my husband, but how do I help him stop this addictive behavior and get my husband back? I don't want to be his enabler. Should I leave him? Our kids are 4 and I want to protect them too. Any advice?