My little brother is a bit unruly, he's gotten into smoking weed and was drinking with his friends (semi biweekly) while in the care of my family. And he's only 13!! Now he's with me and I just don't know what to do or where to start. I can't keep an eye on him 24/7.
Prayers, advice, anything will do. I definitely got my work cut out for me.
Dang man, I was pretty embarrassed because here I am no shaved legs in my Adam Sandler get up. I know it wasn't that big of a deal and the dude didn't care. But it's the principal of things I guess. Plus, seeing my mom just hanging outside with all her stuff spewed around looking like.. idk.
Definitely could see that the guy pitied us or something, which made it even worse for me. Stupid, everytime I feel a sort of way I act rude too. Really need to work on my tone of voice and cursing. But mostly, I hope I don't get in the habit of bumping into buddy with my mother. Yeesh...
Back to cleaning I guess.
It was bizarre, I could feel and hear what they thought the entirety of it. Something about us working together better, don't know, but it all felt so intimate and real.
I'm tired of being... The me I am right now. I'm so unfulfilled and it's been causing a huge strain on my relationship with God. At this point I don't feel the love I had for God anymore. Yeah, I still pray but I don't read my Bible. I don't trust Him. I don't walk in His truth or mercy. I don't do much of anything besides reflect on everything I've lost due to my own stupid selfish evil choices over the years.
I gotta make God a priority above all things, because without Him I genuinely cannot live. I cannot love as hard as I used to. I cannot work hard and be dedicated as before. I can't do anything. I've been so empty and wayward. I Yearn for the girl that I was. I need prayers, scriptures and advice to help me finally break this rock that has become my being. I've gotta break free from this identity and life, because it truly isn't and has never been really mine. I feel like I'm wearing someone else's face and living someone else's life, like these shoes weren't even Mine to begin with.
This version of myself has to die. Permanently.