u/-sweet-carolina-

So my first gcse is tomorrow morning and I’ve barely revised for it. I’ve had three sets of mock exams before this and I’ve been able to revise well and over a long period of time, getting high grades in everything (a couple 9s, mostly 8s, a couple 7s and one 6), but for the actual exams I’ve just done basically nothing. I kept procrastinating and putting it off and avoiding it and here we are. I know I’m a good student and I know I’ll do well anyway, and I have safety schools for sixth form, but the guilt is awful. I started sertraline about two months ago for depression and subtle anxiety, and I’m through the worst of the side effects but it’s made my anxiety… different? Like I’m anxious in the mornings and evenings but not actually anxious enough that I’m motivated to do anything. I was taking elvanse 60mg for my last exams and revision periods but am on concerta 54mg now because I was losing weight on elvanse, and concerta is a little less helpful at getting me to focus but has less side effects. I’m taking 4mg melatonin too which has helped me sleep a lot better, and I’m hoping I’ll survive this first exam because it’s one I’m good at and then be able to make the most of my study leave. I guess I’m just struggling to find a balance between taking accountability and feeling really guilty vs acknowledging my adhd and that it’s all in the past and i can’t change it and not blaming myself.